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A chance remark in a New York bar in 1991 — "you're an idealist" — lands differently than expected. Simon and Lee trace that moment through the topsy-turviness of political labels, from Antifa on a Lisbon rooftop to the day idealism became an insult. Along the way: growing up under IRA bombs and Cold War dread, algorithmically sorted fear, and whether a badly-timed fart rules out the simulation.

Mentioned

- Wall Street (1987, dir. Oliver Stone) — discussed as cautionary tale vs celebration of greed; Gordon Gekko, Michael Douglas, Charlie Sheen
- Platoon (Oliver Stone)
- Born on the 4th of July (Oliver Stone)
- Supergirl (film, trailer) — discussed; CGI dog face controversy
- John Wick — mentioned in comparison to Supergirl's dog-in-peril setup
- Good Boy (horror film) — cited for a dog considered an excellent actor
- Stonewall — NYC bar and landmark; site of the 1969 uprising
- Marsha P. Johnson — activist; cited for throwing the first brick at Stonewall, pivotal for US gay rights
- Antifa — political movement; discussed in context of linguistic and political inversion
- Trump — mentioned in context of Antifa during his first term
- Jillian — babysitter from childhood story; spent her savings on a Vidal Sassoon haircut
- Vidal Sassoon — hairdresser, mentioned in Jillian story
- IRA — cited in context of childhood anxiety and mainland Britain bombings
- Chernobyl — cited as example of proximate vs remote political anxiety (New Zealand vs UK)
- BBC — cited for one-sided reporting on the IRA
- Jeffrey Miller — the dog

Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net.

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The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

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Simon finds himself crying for multiple things at once. Lee reflects on being largely inoculated from grief since childhood, always the supporter, never quite allowed his own response. An honest conversation about mortality, what we carry, and Swedish death cleaning.

Mentions

• Touch by Ashley Montague — cited for the observation that "touch" has the longest entry in the Oxford English Dictionary, longer even than "love"
• Concentric circles of grief — diagram showing inner/outer circles for determining who gives support vs. who can express grief outward; discussed in context of knowing your place in someone else's bereavement
• Swedish death cleaning — practice of clearing possessions before death so loved ones aren't burdened with sorting them; Lee's mum has done this, including getting rid of 400 books
• 2012 Olympics — mentioned as a turning point when arts funding was redirected and a number of mid-scale venues closed, contributing to the decline of the UK live arts scene ahead of Brexit

Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net.

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The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan Mail

Lee and Simon move from the absurd grind of international transit and the ways money buys freedom from friction into a sharper reflection on systems, meritocracy and the stories we tell about fairness. The episode lands somewhere quieter and more human, with transhumanism and techno-hope set against goodbye, touch, family and the fragile consolation of ordinary love.

Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net.

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The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)