Anything But Squished

By: Isaiah Irons

Narrated by: Maximillian Breed

Between death still existing in the afterlife, running through death games that resembled a few videogames I had played in my past, and just trying to survive, just trying not to get squished...Sigh. And between the death of my wife a few years back, not knowing if my daughter was alive or not, and meeting a new friend who mysteriously received all my memories—even my weird-ass dreams that I don’t want anyone to know about—and then having her expose those buried memories to everyone...Sigh. Between all those things, you know what sucks more?

Oh shit, I haven’t even told you about Greg yet. Stupid Greg.

Anyway, you know what sucks even more than Greg? Let me tell you, but you probably already know. You can probably feel it.

It’s that feeling of being afraid of what’s next. To not know what’s next. The unknown.

That’s why I’m writing this. To lift the veil and to tell you the truth. Earth has been hushslapped—my daughters taught me that one. It’s like joining a voice call only to get muted and deafened at the same time. No communication in, no communication out—only instead of you on a pointless-in-the-first-place voice call, it happened to all of Earth...Our entire universe.

Except the Omniverse—our hushslappers—didn’t take into account this guy. So buckle up cowboy—uhh, or girl. Crap, I’m gonna get canceled.

Greg, stop the recording. Let’s try again.

©2024, 2025 Simple Book Publishing (P)2025 Simple Book Publishing

Great listen, moments got real laughs from me!

I was givin a review code for free and gave this story a chance. It gets to the point of the story quickly, and gets its hooks into you fast. I kept listening a good chunk of hours every day till it was done!

The story was fun, the characters felt real, and their bantering got some real laughs out of me. The voice of Greg the guide had some really great moments. Shut up, Greg.

Narration was great, story was fun and kept me hooked the whole way through. I can't wait for a sequel.

A few good chuckles and some eye rolls

Overall not sure if this was for me, but I still enjoyed myself. The “straight guy humor” of feminine hygiene product fear, ifartedinfrontofher, and whatever the whole Charlie thing was—were big turn offs. Thankfully there’s more to the story than that and even some of the humor got me coming around eventually.

I wasn’t wowed by the game system but I think these things need time to build; deeper into the story this already improves but I’d hope future installments push things in a more unique direction. Liked the characters and they were distinct enough, just wish the MC was more interesting.

Narrator worked hard on this one. It’s definitely a performance and not just a reading. I felt like a few parts were a bit too slow, but also feel like that’s the trade off for something this theatrical. Really brought the characters to life.

A fun jaunt through the MMORPG forest.

I loved the fun banter between the characters. Great mix of world building and action. Depth of emotion is there taking you in the highs and lows of a battle royale. Excited for the next one!

Unique take on LitRPG and death

What a ride this story was. I admit, for probably the first hour I wasn’t convinced I’d enjoy this work, but once the story gets going, and you get used to the narrator, it’s worth it!

This book did a good job of giving you the information you need to understand gear, levels, and abilities without bogging you down in stats. The story is a fresh take on the afterlife, and deals with themes of suffering and loss quite well.

My biggest gripe is the power of the mc and party. While the mc did face some challenges, there really was never a point that I felt truly made me question how they’d do.

Great book, definitely give it a chance. Excited to see what the next brings, and also…Fuck Greg!

Unique take in LITRPG

I was honestly on the fence for this book when I first started. The beginning threw me with his aversion to feminine products, but once that part was over, and it was such a small part, this book legitimately had me enthralled. I normally dislike Battle Royale style games because what progress is there? The author spun this in such a way that I loved the set up of the "game" and the system itself. Without spoiling too much the class mechanics are really cool and the added depth the author threw into the battle Royale genre really made it stand out.

it was my first time listening to this narrator and he did a fantastic job as well. There was one voice I disliked, but she was not in it for long and the voice fit the character so it's not a big deal. 10/10 especially for the emotional parts.

This was also the first time I've heard of this author and I am now looking forward to more of their books. Plot was great. Character interactions were fantastic. The world building was a bit slow, but we were learning with the MC so that makes sense.

One thing, I felt so bad for Greg for a good bit of this book, but honestly...shut up Greg.