Dance of the Reptiles

Rampaging Tourists, Marauding Pythons, Larcenous Legislators, Crazed Celebrities, and Tar-Balled Beaches: Selected Columns

By: Carl Hiaasen, Diane Stevenson - editor

Narrated by: Arte Johnson

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A collection of the best Miami Herald columns from the New York Times bestselling author of Squeeze Me on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system.

If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen’s Miami Herald columns, which lay bare the stories—large and small—that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction.

Hiaasen offers his commentary—indignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilarious—on issues like the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff's trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections. Whether or not you have read Carl Hiaasen before, you are in for a wild ride.

Critic reviews

"Although some say the satire practically writes itself in this state, Hiaasen raises it to a higher level. One caveat, though: Unless you have an intravenous drip of blood pressure meds, you might want to read just a few of these columns at a time."
—Tampa Bay Times

“Hiaasen doesn’t really need to keep his day job as a columnist for the Miami Herald, but fortunately for the residents of Florida and for his vast readership, he has.... The state of Florida does not come off too well in Hiaasen’s columns, but one welcome positive of the Sunshine State is obvious—Carl Hiaasen.”
—The Free-Lance Star (Fredericksburg, VA)

"Hiaasen makes this parade of idiocy and avarice palatable with a kind of gallows humor. The more appalling the situation, the greater the potential for hilarity.... He is not so much stridently liberal as steadfastly sensible, his wit girded by palpable anger."
—The Post and Courier (Charleston)

"Hiaasen employs a seasoned bullshit detector that is among the most acute in American journalism. ... If Florida is the poster child for a nation’s fiscal and political disintegration, Hiaasen is the state’s galloping knight (in)errant, slaying the dragons of ineptitude, arrogance and idiocy."
—Kirkus Reviews

"Entertaining.... Hilarious and unnerving ... for Hiaasen’s ability to awaken outrage and for his eye for oddity."
—Booklist

Praise for Carl Hiaasen's previous column collections, Paradise Screwed and Kick Ass

“Shows you that Hiaasen’s seemingly implausible fictional premises aren’t really far-fetched at all. He just knows Florida.”
—Playboy

“Reminiscent of the snarky, opinionated newspaper articles of the great Mark Twain, Hiaasen’s columns are finely crafted little gems.”
—Booklist

“Lively and well-reported ... Illuminated by all the wit and keen descriptive powers of his fiction.”
—Salon

Three scoops of classic Carl

If you've never read this fellows stories... Where the heck have you been????? His characters are graduates of Walt Disney mental hospital. The plots more twisted than spaghetti cooked. I can't help being drawn in and binge reading for hours. Bravo Carl Bravo!!!

APT FOR TODAY

I was going to call this review a History of Today. It is so very relevant to 2017 and the American political landscape that I kept being amused by the irony. The author cares about creation and the ecology of Florida's inland as well as the popular coastal vacation areas. He also cares about the economy and the people who retire to the state, thinking it will be a good place to live out the rest of their lives in warmth and comfort.

Hiaasen is not writing about 2017, however, or all of American politics -- his columns from the news in Florida several years ago ironically fit todasy's climate. And, they are funny in a sarcastic way. Not being from the sunshine state I appreciated this insider's view of FL and its development over time. Incidentally, I read the book right before Hurricanes Harvey, Irma, Jose asnd Maria hit the Gulf Coast and Southern FL this year. His words seemed almost prophetic.

Loved the stories!

Would you consider the audio edition of Dance of the Reptiles to be better than the print version?

I loved this book and the narration was spot-on. I felt the Carl Hiaasen got a little preachy in parts but overlooking that it was a great listen.

Facts

Florida’s political history provided reasonable facts for the shit show happening in 2023. Politicians are only in it for power and money.

Great book. Required reading!

I've read pretty much all of Carl Haaasen's novels but wasn't sure how I'd like a book containing his newspaper editorials.
Wow, was I surprised. This book is brilliant. It has everything from humor to political shenanigans.
Arte Johnson is masterful as the reader.
Should be required reading for all politicians.