Don't Be Yourself

Why Authenticity Is Overrated (and What to Do Instead)

By: Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic

Narrated by: Tim Fannon

For years, we've been told that authenticity is the key to success—that we should be true to ourselves, tune out others' opinions, and lead with unwavering genuineness. This feel-good message has spawned countless self-help books, leadership seminars, and viral social media posts.

There's just one problem: science says it's wrong. Drawing on decades of research, renowned psychologist Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic reveals an uncomfortable truth: our obsession with authenticity is backfiring. From Silicon Valley's authenticity worship to failed diversity programs, he exposes how our fixation on our "true selves" undermines both individual and organizational success.

The most successful people aren't those who rigidly "stay true to themselves." They're the ones who adapt and evolve, largely by paying a great deal of attention to how others see them and adjusting their behavior to the requirements of each situation. The evidence is clear: when we focus less on expressing our authentic selves and more on understanding others, we become better humans. Blending the latest revelations in psychology with razor-sharp cultural critique, Don't Be Yourself doesn't just challenge conventional wisdom—it offers a playbook for long-lasting career success.

©2025 Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic (P)2025 Ascent Audio

Challenges Pop Psychology

The author does a great job challenging some common cliches in pop psychology such as radical honesty and not caring about what others think of you. In society, people tend to romanticize the notion of free-thinking innovators like Steve Jobs or Elon Musk who went against the grain of cultural norms and expectations to produce great products. What people don't realize is that for every Steve Jobs, there are countless other people with the same traits that struggle to hold down a job despite having high potential.

Unless you plan to work for yourself, you will need to learn the social skills necessary to work with others in a civil way, and that point is hard to dispute. He also mentioned that job interviews are mostly about determining whether or not you have the social skills needed to be a cultural fit at a given organization.

The only negative part about the book was that some explanations were long-winded and drawn out. I understood the concepts of the chapter, but still has another 30 minutes for the chapter within the audiobook version. I would still recommend overall.

I appreciate the purpose or thesis of the book.

I agree with the premise or thesis of the book, however, as I got into it, it seemed to me that the author had little regard or appreciation for context. Many of his negative example examples were taken completely out of context.

Some good concepts but too long

I appreciated some of the concepts provided ; however, those could’ve been presented in half the length.