Far From the Tree

Parents, Children and the Search for Identity

By: Andrew Solomon

Narrated by: Andrew Solomon

* Selected as One of the Best Books of the 21st Century by The New York Times *

* WINNER of the National Book Critics Circle Award * Books for a Better Life Award * The New York Times Book Review’s 10 Best Books of the Year *

This masterpiece by the National Book Award–winning author of The Noonday Demon features stories of parents who not only learn to deal with their exceptional children, but also find profound meaning in doing so—“a brave, beautiful book that will expand your humanity” (People).

Solomon’s startling proposition in Far from the Tree is that being exceptional is at the core of the human condition—that difference is what unites us. He writes about families coping with deafness, dwarfism, Down syndrome, autism, schizophrenia, or multiple severe disabilities; with children who are prodigies, who are conceived in rape, who become criminals, who are transgender. While each of these characteristics is potentially isolating, the experience of difference within families is universal, and Solomon documents triumphs of love over prejudice in every chapter.

All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent should parents accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves. Drawing on ten years of research and interviews with more than three hundred families, Solomon mines the eloquence of ordinary people facing extreme challenges.

Elegantly reported by a spectacularly original and compassionate thinker, Far from the Tree explores how people who love each other must struggle to accept each other—a theme in every family’s life.

A peek into deeply challenged lives

If you could sum up Far from the Tree in three words, what would they be?

Eye-opening, poignant, triumphant

What was one of the most memorable moments of Far from the Tree?

The forgiveness of a healthcare worker by parents whose MDS child who died because of a random careless act.

How could the performance have been better?

I believe a different narrator, not the author but a professional actor would elevate the experience of listening.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

The question of correcting 'flaws' of nature in lieu of accepting a creature as created by God and by genetics, etc. creates a paradox with mixed feelings and a sense of knowing that either choice can be right or wrong but inevitably is irrevocable.

Any additional comments?

For parents and future parents because you never know if you will be a subject of such a book.

absolutely insightful and inspiring

Solomons way of connecting with the families he interviews and his comparisons between social norm and acceptance is a compelling read.

Extraordinary

As someone who works with disabled children of all kinds, this book was a revelation. Well-researched and beyond thorough, it serves as an encyclopedia of emotions for those who interact with children who are “far from the tree.”

Previous reviewers have criticized the autism chapter. As someone who works directly with children who have autism, I agree that this is not the best chapter in the book. But to give this book a 1-Star review because they didn’t like the one chapter seems petty. This book wasn’t meant to be a how-to manual about working with kids who have autism. There are plenty of other books on that topic.

In my reading, no other book comes close to the thorough examination that Mr. Solomon gives to the concepts of parenthood and disability. I am beyond impressed, and I am grateful to him for documenting this world of experience.

A Masterful Treatise on Identity

A must read for every member of the human family Solomon seeks to understand how we respond to and embrace "other."

Emotional roller coaster of families and children

This book was amazing and it has changed my perspective forever. Everyone is a person, despite there difficulties and challenges. My heart breaks because of how cruel the world can truly be.