I’m Not High-Maintenance (As Long as Everything’s Perfect)

A Chef’s Diary- 30 Years of Cooking, Kitchens and Chaos

By: Matthew Gladstone

Narrated by: Matthew Gladstone

MATTHEW GLADSTONE
THIRTY YEARS. A THOUSAND KITCHENS

I’ve had more burns, long nights, and impossible clients than I can count in my thirty years as a chef. A few thought that a “private chef” meant personal therapist — they weren’t wrong. This isn’t a cookbook; it’s a confession — the unfiltered truth about what really happens behind those perfect families.

From kitchens with too many egos to estates with too much money, from whispered chaos to dinners for people who don’t actually eat — it’s all held together with sarcasm, salt, and a stubborn refusal to quit.

If you’ve ever cooked for crazy, or just wondered what happens once the kitchen door swings shut, pull up a stool. Thirty years. A thousand kitchens. Still standing. Still laughing. Still not sugarcoating a damn thing.

©2025 Matthew Gladstone (P)2026 Matthew Gladstone

Perfection Is the Standard — and This Book Gets It

As a three-decade UHNW Personal Assistant, I know intimately the level of perfection expected behind private gates — where excellence isn’t appreciated, it’s assumed. That’s why I’m Not High-Maintenance (As Long As Everything’s Perfect): A Chef’s Diary – 30 Years of Cooking, Kitchens and Chaos resonated with me so deeply.

Matthew’s storytelling is brutally honest, sharply observant, and laced with perfectly timed humor. Each chapter pulls you into the beautiful chaos of elite kitchens and high-pressure private service, where standards are sky-high and gratitude is rare. His experiences reflect the unspoken reality of working for UHNW households — the precision, the unpredictability, and the relentless demand for flawless execution.

What moved me most was his unwavering passion and self-respect. Through every chaotic role and impossible personality, he never loses his integrity or pride in his craft. I found myself cheering him on in every chapter.

If you’ve ever worked behind the scenes in high-performance private environments, this book will feel both validating and cathartic. A must-read for anyone who understands that “low maintenance” often means “everything must be perfect.”

Gifted Storytelling

I was laughing out loud in my car. I can relate to so many moments. I highly recommend this book to all hospitality professionals.