Jurassic Jackass

The Uffizi Museum of Dysfunction

By: Francesca Vale

Narrated by: Francesca Vale

Jurassic Jackass: The Uffizi Museum of Dysfunction is a satirical memoir that turns heartbreak into high art. Told through a museum-style narrative of “exhibits,” it curates one woman’s relationship with a charmingly avoidant Italian man whose emotional architecture proves as unstable as a Renaissance ruin.

Francesca Vale, a real-estate writer and brand strategist, applies her eye for structure to the fragile frameworks of love and self-delusion. Each exhibit part essay, part confession uncovers the humor, absurdity, and strange beauty within emotional chaos. From “Flat-Packed with Missing Screws,” which captures the IKEA-grade assembly of modern relationships, to “The Archaeologist and the Ashes,” a final excavation of lessons learned, the book reframes dysfunction as an emotional anthropology.

With wit as sharp as a chisel and prose polished to a Renaissance shine, Jurassic Jackass is both brutally honest and unexpectedly tender and proves that even in the rubble of love gone wrong, there is still room for renovation.

©2025 Francesca Vale (P)2026 Francesca Vale