Mo(u)rning Joy

A Memoir of Stillbirth, Grief, and Grace

By: Kalan Chapman Lloyd

Narrated by: Virtual Voice

"Weeping may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5

"If the raw reality of stillbirth, loss of pregnancy, or miscarriage has rendered you senseless, if you feel helpless in friending a grieving family, then you will be touched by the words of care and concern that you can't always think to say at the time. I highly recommend this unabashed account of Kalan Lloyd's journey toward wholeness."-Susanna Fitzgerald, MSW

"A cry-laugh, laugh-cry. What makes it so good is how she conveys the terrible sadness and madness of losing a child."-Heath Mueller, M.D., Psychiatry

"Kalan's frank, honest expression of her personal experience will bring hope and encouragement to many." -Lisa Nolan, Associate Pastor, Cornerstone Fellowship

"Rarely as healthcare providers do we have the opportunity to hear the intimate thoughts and feelings of a patient who has been delivered the most heartbreaking news. This memoir will help us all be better friends, family members, and caregivers to those that have experienced such loss." -Shara Young, M.D., OBGYN

"This is the book no one wants to read; the story no one wants to write. This is about mourning joy and eventually... finding joy in the morning." - Kalan, mama


Kalan Chapman Lloyd writes what she knows with heart, humor and unflinching truth. In Mo(u)rning Joy, she writes about the death of her child Caswell and his stillbirth, covering grief, faith, and the slow work of learning how to live again.