Remothering Myself

A Memoir of Breaking Cycles and Becoming Whole

By: Sarah Harris-Cowan

Narrated by: Elizabeth Merrill

I wasn’t the kind of mother I wanted to be.

Raised in chaos and violence, I carried my wounds into early motherhood, young, overwhelmed, and repeating the very patterns I swore I’d never pass on. I screamed. I hit. I walked away when they needed me most. And eventually, I gave up custody of the children I loved more than anything.

This is not a redemption story with a neat bow. It’s a raw, unflinching memoir about what it takes to break generational cycles from the inside out. About failing -deeply- and still choosing to come back. About learning how to parent with intention after years of surviving on instinct. About becoming a professional nanny, and finding healing in the sacred, everyday moments of caregiving. And about finally, at age forty, being diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and starting to understand myself for the first time.

Remothering Myself is a story for anyone who’s ever felt like they were too far gone. It’s for mothers carrying guilt, for survivors learning how to live in their bodies, for cycle-breakers trying to raise children differently than they were raised.

It’s not just a book about motherhood. It’s a book about becoming.

©2025 Sarah Harris Cowan (P)2025 Sarah Harris Cowan

Living through trauma and finding healing

First I will say that this book is very triggering for victims of childhood abuse. I feel that the author Sarah has tremendous courage in being able to speak her truth. when she first met her husband I think that in that moment she was at the point of sabotage and he was a huge part of what helped her grow. a healthy relationship always can help with healing and growth. her becoming a nanny and being able to heal help and lift others up is such a wonderful reward. I find that people who go through the worst in life either go down the drain or they find a way to help others. the author has found her way and that is incredible to hear. the only critique I can give to this book is the timeline kind of jumped around a little bit in some places and I was confused of where we were at until I read on more. but as a newer author I think that her future works are going to continue to grow and her details about the things that she is passionate about and descriptions are beautifully written. I would definitely recommend reading if you have been through serious trauma and have difficulty speaking on it because of embarrassment and maybe the bad things you did because of your own trauma. I know that this book has helped me a feel less alone.