Sex Diaries

Real-life Stories of Non-Monogamy and Polyamory

By: Alyssa Shelasky, New York Magazine, Esther Perel - introduction

Intimate, captivating, never-before-seen true stories from the edge of modern sex and dating, compiled by Alyssa Shelasky, in the style of her wildly popular New York Magazine column—with an introduction from Esther Perel, renowned psychotherapist and NYT bestselling author of Mating in Captivity

Polyamory is hardly a new cultural touchstone, yet as it continues to enter the mainstream dating world, its realities often remain opaque. What does the everyday life of someone with multiple partners actually look like? How do you navigate the daily logistics and the competing schedules? How do you deal with jealousy? In this candid, groundbreaking compilation of anonymous accounts, told by real people navigating sex and dating outside the bounds of traditional monogamy, Alyssa Shelasky pulls back the curtain.

A 67-year-old woman keeps a collection of well-endowed lovers in various corners of the world; a restaurant owner is jolted back to life when she gets illicit messages from a married man; a Brooklynite plans a porn brunch for her birthday, reveling in the fact that she finally feels at ease in her body.

Some diarists are just beginning to question their relationship with monogamy, others have been polyamorous for a long-time. Some accounts are graphic and dishy, while others focus on the search for lasting connections that feel genuinely liberatory. Every single one is strikingly honest and authentic, revealing expansive tales of love, lust, longing and desire.