Swiping Wrong

Online Dating for Zeros

By: Clare Chu, Rachelle Ayala

Narrated by: Virtual Voice

Are you ready to LOL your way through the wild world of online dating? Join our intrepid romantic, Zoey Zero, and her AI-guided Cupid, CPUid, in a sidesplitting adventure to find love—or at least some epic stories to share with your friends. Armed with unbreakable optimism, razor-sharp wit, and a mischievous virtual wingman, our hopeless un-romantic love seeker dives headfirst into the digital dating scene: from crafting the perfect, not-so-honest dating profile, interpreting cryptic text messages from potential love interests, to escaping the friend zone.

Our misguide details her online dating experiences, along with testimonials of CPUid’s many desperate clients as they navigate the minefields of ghosting gaffes, emoji enigmas, and the professional dating merry-go-round.

Laugh, cringe, and root for Zoey Zero as she puts her heart—and her profile—on the line. Whether you’re a seasoned swiper or a digital dating newbie, you’ll find yourself nodding along with Zoey’s misadventures and clicking on her CPUid affiliate link to discover the art of making all the wrong moves in all the wrong places.

Who needs a fairytale ending when you can have a rollicking, uproarious journey? Swipe right on this book and get ready to LOL your way to love (or something like it)!

Intro minutes explain everything that's wrong

The first 5 minutes of this book explain why the author is single. She gives 5 allegedly real-life examples of meeting men through some AI-matchmaker CPUID, and how the dates, in her eyes, went wrong due the men doing or saying things, in her opinion, ridiculous or obviously wrong. Yet in the first five given examples - the men were saying things either only slightly unexpected, or straight up very reasonable and good. One 40y/o man said he'd like to have kids, within a year or two. What's wrong with that??? Another 33yo cosmetic surgeon literally complimented her looks by saying her face can be used as a model (of a beauty salon).
The author proceeds to narrate how she moved on after that, implying that it's obvious how this or that triggered red flags with her.
If this CPUID sets her up with matches as "bad" as this - heck, it's doing a better job than most real-world matchmakers, and the lady needs to just reflect on the absurd reasons she uses to put an X on perfectly fine dates and men.