The Hungry Girl

A Yale Medical Mystery

By: Dr. Z.

Narrated by: Virtual Voice

IF YOU LOST WEIGHT, WHO WOULD YOU BE ? Young Yale medical student Sara Brown hated being "overweight" but the more she fretted about it, the more weight she gained. Sure she was told she had a pretty face and a nice personality, but that and 50 cents.... And worse one day her huge ass bumped into the Dean of students, making him spill his scalding hot cafeteria coffee on the delicate gracile hands of Dr. Max Spence, the most skilled brain surgeon in New Haven. She was given one more chance, lose weight, or get booted out. She told her best friend Harriet Wong (weight 97 pounds), "I am eating only a half breakfast burrito, to start my diet." Okay. And then she stacked up tiny chocolates on the treadmill, so she rewarded herself every fifteen minutes to keep her "blood sugar up." Oh man, some diet. She gained ten more pounds. Donuts went missing from the ER. They couldn't wait to get rid of her. And then she heard about a new miracle weight loss program, involving skinny DNA transfer, and life changing bowel surgery. "All we do is snip some stomach to make it smaller and remove the greater omentum, narrow the third portion of the duodenum, remove a few inches of the jejunum and, lastly place a small dose of super charged DNA into the Canal of Nuck. And you are good to go." That is what Dr Weidman, the innovative but rushed physician promised in his thick German Harvard accent. "You will soon have a very hot body and a hot boyfriend, and some day will become an excellent doctor yourself!" What could go wrong ? If you lost weight, who would you be?