Alpha Male Surgery (w/ Dylan Carlino)

Michelle is back in New York where she’s battling freezing apartments, cursed bodysuits, and the ongoing search for a pair of non-lethal sweatpants—only to discover that both Old Navy and TJ Maxx may be actively working against the human body. Enter comedian and internet sensation Dylan Carlino, joining live from Texas with a brand new laptop purchased solely for this appearance and a shocking backstory involving accidentally deleting an entire microphone.

Together they cover Dylan’s rise from 10K to nearly 700K followers in under a year, the dark psychology of influencer culture, and why stand-ups are being emotionally replaced by ring lights. Plus: Portland post-pandemic, bombing in Austin, the dangers of “minky fabric,” and a truly unforgettable deep dive into body-shaping garments.

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