Chuck Norris: A Real American Hero

This country ballad features the funny side of Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris, a real American hero — May he rest in peace!

Chuck Norris Funnies lyrics

Chuck Norris was a man for all seasonsAnd for all reasonsHis name and style are legendAnd he saw his fans as friends

Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ballThe dark is afraid of Chuck NorrisIf you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win.Forever.

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck NorrisThe wrong way just onceYou know what happened to themChuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding

We live in an expanding universeAll trying to get away from Chuck NorrisChuck Norris can speak BrailleAnd can tie his shoes with his feet

Chuck Norris used to beat up his shadowBecause it was following too closeIt now stands 15 feet behind himAlways andforever

Chuck Norris once kicked a coal mineAnd turned it into a diamond mineChuck Norris doesn’t wear a watchHe decides what time it is

Chuck Norris once went skydivingBut promised never to do it againOne Grand Canyon is enough.Chuck Norris stands faster than anyone can run

Chuck Norris’ belly buttonIs actually a power outletChuck Norris destroyed the periodic tableBecause he only recognizes the element of surprise

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomesChuck Norris has 72 genesAnd they’re all lethalChuck Norris can divide by zero

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at nightHe checks his closet for Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a cobraAfter 5 days of agonizing pain, the cobra diedChuck Norris has a mug of nailsInstead of coffee in the morning

Chuck Norris doesn’t read booksHe stares them downUntil he gets what he wantsChuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain

Chuck Norris counted to infinity… twiceIn the Beginning there was nothingThen Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothingAnd told it to get a job

Chuck Norris was a man for all seasonsAnd for all reasonsHis name and style are legendAnd he saw his fans as friends

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