Ep 66 - Ten Reasons Melissa Cannot Go to War and Plantar Fasciitis Is Only Number Two | The Radke Show

SHOW NOTES

Disney recap, a Costco churro controversy, plantar fasciitis that almost required an ax, and ten official reasons Melissa Radke cannot go to war. EP 66 is the post-vacation episode where everything that happened on the road finally gets its day in court.

David’s Magic Kingdom GPS was flawless. Not one backtrack. Not one spontaneous funnel cake. David ate a churro in Rocco’s honor, Melissa got a corn dog, and her feet hurt so bad she told her mother she would cut them off and mail them home. Then Costco had the nerve to replace their churro with churro-flavored ice cream, and Melissa has a direct message for corporate. The episode closes with a TikTok-inspired segment: ten very specific, very personal reasons why Melissa cannot and will not be going to war. Wide ankles, time zones, travel constipation, lost AirPods, menopause, and a hangnail that used to tell her which way was right. It is a complete list.

QUOTES WORTH HIGHLIGHTING

“I said, if I had an ax, I would cut my feet off and mail them back to you. I think walking around on my stumps would be more heavenly than how they feel right now.”

Melissa, to her mother, on plantar fasciitis at Disney

“Dear Costco. If you have Bonita in the back slicing churros to put on top of ice cream, why are you not just giving us the dadgum churro? I am likely to buy so much more from you when I am walking around with that tasty, salty, sweet snack in my hand.”

Melissa, addressing Costco corporate directly

“Instead of putting the lives of our honorable service men and women on the line, if you sent 3,000 menopausal women, they would tear that place up in urban door-to-door warfare.”

David, and he is not entirely wrong

LINKS MENTIONED

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✨ Beautiful Yu Health Supplements: bit.ly/beautifulyu

📖 Melissa’s Book - Chicken-Fried Women: bit.ly/ChickenFriedWomen

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