• Nightly News Roundup for March 25, 2026
    Mar 26 2026

    The Treasury published its own insolvency report and the press missed it entirely; America owes $136 trillion when you count the obligations the government keeps off the books, and federal accountants haven't been able to sign off on the numbers in 29 consecutive years; Iran told Trump the peace plan was excessive and Karoline Leavitt promised hell while the 82nd Airborne loaded up for a region where nobody is technically negotiating; a Los Angeles jury decided Mark Zuckerberg ran a knowing child-harm operation and he flew in personally to hear it; day 40 of the DHS shutdown has TSA running on fumes while both parties spent Tuesday calling each other's proposals fictional; the CDC has burned through three directors, lost a cop to a gunman at its own headquarters, had its vaccine schedule voided by a federal judge, and the White House missed the legal deadline to replace anyone; the United States voted against calling the slave trade a crime against humanity the same week the president complained slavery gets too much coverage at the Smithsonian; and Emily Gregory won the Mar-a-Lago statehouse seat by 2.4 points after Donald Trump campaigned hard, posted harder, and cast his ballot by mail. Tape rolls.



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    5 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for March 24, 2026
    Mar 24 2026
    Trump held a press conference and declared victory over Iran four times in thirty-nine minutes while also wanting a ceasefire, not wanting a ceasefire, and sending Marines with no boots on the ground; a white plumber with an associate degree is now running Homeland Security because DEI is the problem; the president mailed his ballot two days after calling mail-in voting cheating; he ordered Republicans to kill the DHS deal on Sunday and signed it on Tuesday because his ICE agents couldn't find a bomb in a diaper bag; and a dead pilot tried to warn us about LaGuardia months ago and someone filed it and went to lunch. Tape rolls.

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    5 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for March 23, 2026
    Mar 24 2026
    Donald Trump broke the airports, then deployed ICE agents who can't screen luggage to fix them; the administration paid a French oil company $928 million to stop building wind farms, announced the death of subsidies with a straight face, and called it energy independence; Iran and America are either negotiating or lying about negotiating while 2,000 people are dead and Jared Kushner holds the pen; Russian intelligence defeated the entire U.S. security apparatus with a fake help desk email; the Navy shipped 4,200 Marines toward a war it won't name while calling the deployment routine; the Pentagon recruited civilian volunteers to do ICE data entry by comparing deportations to wildfire relief; and a conservative magazine founder proposed a constitutional coup — with a Democrat as VP — as the last sane off-ramp anyone could find. Tape rolls.

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    6 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for Mar. 17, 2026
    Mar 18 2026

    Donald Trump got ghosted by all thirty-two NATO allies for a war he started, then declared he never needed them — from inside a meeting with Ireland, a country not in NATO; the administration's anti-war conscience turned out to be an antisemite, which tracks; the president who ran on ending migrant farm labor quietly slashed migrant farmworker wages to fix the shortage his deportations caused; Jeanine Pirro went on Fox News to beg viewers to become federal prosecutors because the DOJ fired everyone with a résumé; Mike Johnson asked for $16.5 billion to restock munitions for a not-war that Congress never authorized; a Republican subpoenaed a Republican over Jeffrey Epstein files that implicate people nobody wants to name out loud; and DOGE fired the exact officials whose only job was preventing what's currently happening in the Strait of Hormuz. Tape rolls.



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    7 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for Mar. 12, 2026
    Mar 13 2026

    Tonight: A ghost supreme leader nobody's seen since his own coronation choked off 20% of the world's daily oil supply, Energy Secretary Chris Wright told America it's a "weeks not months" problem while Brent crude screamed 25% higher and Bahrain declared force majeure, Sen. Ron Johnson single-handedly killed the Major Richard Star Act because a $39 trillion debt he helped build suddenly became a moral emergency, DHS purged three officials for refusing to forge federal records — and the whole thing started because one CBP officer did her job correctly, someone drove a mortar-loaded vehicle into a Michigan synagogue with a preschool inside and got shot dead by the building's own security, and thousands of white South Africans are fleeing to the country Donald Trump insists is persecuting them, as 3,500 Afrikaners fly the other direction toward the chaos those thousands are escaping. Tape rolls.



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    6 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for Mar. 11, 2026
    Mar 12 2026

    Tonight: Donald Trump called a 12-day Middle East war a "short-term excursion" while simultaneously declaring "we haven't won enough" and suggesting Iran bombed its own girls' school with an American Tomahawk missile, Pete Hegseth gutted civilian casualty protocols in the name of lethality and the Pentagon's own investigators concluded outdated U.S. targeting data killed 165 children in Minab, a DOGE staffer allegedly walked out of the Social Security Administration with 500 million Americans' records on a thumb drive headed for a private employer, BlackRock locked the exits on a $26 billion fund and reminded the private credit industry that illiquid means illiquid until it means insolvent, James Comer demanded Epstein accountability on Fox News while surgically removing the names "Donald Trump" and "Bill Barr" from the sentence, and a federal jury watched video evidence and convicted all three Alexander brothers on every count while Kash Patel's assurances about the Epstein files dissolved in real time. Tape rolls.



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    7 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for Mar. 10, 2026
    Mar 11 2026

    Tonight: Donald Trump launched a war via Truth Social and called it a "short-term excursion" while his own Pentagon declared it had "Only Just Begun to Fight," Pete Hegseth's department spent $98,000 on a grand piano and $6.9 million on lobster tail during the same month he called fat generals unacceptable, a Trump-appointed judge found ICE formally adopted racial profiling as policy and wrote 111 pages explaining why that's a problem, Kash Patel purged 300 counterterrorism agents and ISIS promptly reminded New York City why that matters, Kristi Noem got fired for a $222 million contract nobody approved and Corey Lewandowski is next in line to deny everything, and Eric and Don Jr. are invested in drone companies holding Defense Department contracts in a war where drones are deciding outcomes. Tape rolls.



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    5 mins
  • Nightly News Roundup for Mar. 9, 2026
    Mar 9 2026

    Tonight: Donald Trump described an active war on Iran as a "short-term excursion" while claiming veto power over Tehran's next supreme leader, Lindsey Graham threatened Saudi Arabia for refusing to fight the war he lobbied Trump to start from a golf course, the White House spiked a joint FBI-DHS-NCTC terrorism bulletin warning of Iranian proxy attacks on U.S. soil because the writing needed work, Trump held the legislative calendar hostage to a voter suppression bill stuffed with trans sports bans, Mehmet Oz declared 23 million insured Americans too many and set his target at 19 million, Claudia Sheinbaum reminded Trump's counter-cartel summit that American guns arm 75% of the cartels Trump wants to eradicate, and ICE is tracking protesters in real time using commercially purchased data after the Senate killed the one bill that would have required a warrant to do it. Tape rolls.







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    7 mins