The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read

(And Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did)

By: Philippa Perry

Narrated by: Philippa Perry

More than 1.3 million copies sold worldwide!

“A wonderful book”―Richard Osman

“If you're determinedly not a self-help kind of reader (like me), make an exception for [this book]. And if you're not a parent, don't dismiss it. The message is one of non-judgmental kindness.”―Vogue (London)

How can we have better relationships?

In this instant Sunday Times bestseller, leading psychotherapist Philippa Perry reveals the vital do's and don'ts of relationships. This is a book for us all. Whether you are interested in understanding how your upbringing has shaped you, looking to handle your child's feelings or wishing to support your partner, you will find indispensable information and realistic tips in these pages. Philippa Perry's sane, sage and judgement-free advice is an essential resource on how to have the best possible relationships with the people who matter to you most.

Critic reviews

Praise for The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read:


“[H]onest, warm, and judgment-free. . . this is essential for all parents, from those first expecting to empty nesters. It's never too early or too late to improve the relationship with your children, and, as the title suggests, they'll be glad you did.”
--Booklist (starred review)

“Healing from, and learning not to perpetuate, difficult upbringings is the linchpin of this practical, self-care–centered parenting guide . . . Perry’s kind but professional tone results in a helpful manual that will appeal to new parents who want an expert on board as they take the time to be reflective in their parenting.”
--Publishers Weekly

“Accessible, compassionate.”
--Bookpage

"It is hard to read fast, not just because Perry’s text is punctuated by exercises...but because it prompts so many realisations, or insights, or clearly names things that have until now existed just beyond one’s awareness. And it provides tools, straightforward and manageable if not always easy, that can be implemented at once. I am grateful for it."
--The Guardian (UK)

A gem

I have read (and studied in college) many books on parenting and child development - and this is an invaluable addition to the great works in these domains.
The author does a great job taking by the hand “old” parents and adult children of parents, and new/future parents alike and holding up a compassionate mirror as if to say: “here - this is a place where some inner work needs to be done in order to achieve greater intimacy and harmony within your child-parent or parent-child relationship”.
It’s not easy work, but the insights are priceless and the benefits from doing it - immeasurable for generations to come. Inter-generational trauma is no easy task and definitely no joke.
Not sure what the person who mentioned that this is a judgmental book on parents was talking about. Clearly a chip on (*ahem*) his shoulder. Not once in the book did I hear her start a sentence with “not to be judgmental (…)”.
To the contrary, I found it very soothing and reassuring throughout, that it is “not about the mistake, but the attempts at amends”.
The only place I found it detracting was the child voices she does throughout the narration, which at times are a bit over the top.
But not too off-putting to make me stop listening. The information is a lot more valuable than my personal preference in that area.

Finally something practical

Great Book. Love the chapters on boundaries, adult children, and frustration. Will recommend to
My teachers and parents in my nursery school.

Very insightful

I enjoyed the viewpoint and it was easy to listen the narrative. Raising good humans means making changes in your own life. This book was helpful with understanding some of my own thoughts and feelings about how my parents struggled with raising their children.

Real world advice and examples

Excellent parenting advice, bolstered by plenty of relatable examples and nonjudgmental tone. I now want to buy a hard reference copy to mark up. The chapter formatting makes it easy to jump back to individual topics easily. Really glad I read this.

A must read for parents.

Very informative and eye opening for me. I really wish I had read this 27 years ago. Thank you for sharing.