ABOUT THE EPISODE:

Hunter Clarke-Fields was a painter. She had a graduate degree in art education, a high school teaching job, and what looked from the outside like a creative life. What nobody could see was that she was white-knuckling her way through it, cycling between intense highs and pits of despair she could not explain, having panic attacks in the hallways before she had any tools to handle them. She reached for yoga, then for books on mindfulness, and read about it for years before she finally, at 27, sat down and actually tried.

She set a timer for 10 minutes and sat there thinking the whole time. She was certain she was doing it wrong. But two months in, she looked back and realized she had not fallen into a single pit. Not one. For someone who had been cycling into darkness every couple of weeks for most of her adult life, that was not a small thing. It was everything. And it sent her down a path she never expected, one that eventually turned her into the Mindful Mama Mentor, a podcast host, a mindfulness teacher, and the bestselling author of Raising Good Humans.

Hunter now teaches mindfulness to parents all over the world, with over 20 years of meditation practice behind her and two daughters who, she will freely admit, grew up slightly allergic to the whole thing.

I wanted to have this conversation because I think mindfulness gets written off as vague or soft, and Hunter makes it anything but. She explains what is actually happening in your brain when you blow up at your kid, why longer exhales are not just a cliche, and what she calls the Three R's, a framework so simple you will remember it in the worst moment. She also says something about feelings being like toddlers that I keep coming back to.

If you have ever thought that mindfulness is not for you, or that you are too far gone to start, this one is for you.

You'll learn:

• Why Hunter spent two months certain she was meditating wrong.
• The part of mindfulness most people skip that changes everything.
• Her Three R's for the moments you most want to lose it.
• What she says feelings are like, and why it reframes everything.
• The one thing she would tell a struggling parent to try today.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Hunter Clarke-Fields website
• Raising Good Humans Book
• Mindful Mama Podcast

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When Marie's son was diagnosed with ADHD at eight, she did what devoted parents do. She learned everything and got to work. By the time weed entered the picture in his teens, she had already lined up CRAFT counselors, drug and alcohol specialists, an at-risk youth petition, even a street artist mentor. She is a school psychologist. She had the frameworks, the language. None of it stopped what was coming.

What followed were years of watching him cycle through residential treatment, partial hospitalization, therapeutic boarding school, sober living, and inpatient care, all before nineteen. When he came home and relapsed within days, Marie and her husband made the call she'd been bracing for: he couldn't live with them anymore. And something unexpected happened inside her.

Today, her son has a job. He calls. He showed up to his dad's birthday and ate cake with relatives he hadn't seen in years. Marie listens without lecturing. She is only now learning what it means to help herself.

This is one of the most honest accounts I've heard of doing everything right and still feeling unsure.

If you've done everything you can think of and you're still waiting, this one's for you.

You’ll learn:

• The moment Marie felt a significant shift inside her after her son relapsed and had to leave home
• What “active waiting” looks like in practice, and how that doesn’t mean ‘letting go’
• The specific kind of change talk Marie started hearing from her son, and what it signals about where he is in his process
• How Marie and her husband are thinking through the next housing crisis before it happens, including a practical tool for staying grounded when everything hits at once
• The shift from parenting mode to consulting mode, and what it looks like to give your child a voice in solutions without solving everything for them

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Clear30 App - helps people take a 30 day break from weed
• Jessica Lahey’s “The Gift of Failure”

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When Sally Harris’s middle daughter started down a dangerous path at 14, she did what most devoted mothers do. She fought hard to fix it. Boarding school. Rehab. Anything and everything she could think of. What she did not expect was that the hardest decade of her life was still ahead, or that the coping mechanism she reached for would quietly become a crisis of its own.

Her daughter’s story wound through some of the darkest places a mother can imagine, and Sally will tell you she did not handle it with grace. She handled it the way most of us do: imperfectly, desperately, and often in ways that made things worse. What turned everything around was not something she did for her daughter. It was something she finally did for herself.

Ten years later, her daughter is back. They speak together publicly. They laugh about things that were anything but funny at the time. Sally now coaches moms who are somewhere in the middle of their own version of this, and she brings the kind of clarity you can only get from having actually lived it.

This conversation goes to places I do not hear enough people talking about honestly: what it does to a mother when her child goes silent, the ways we unknowingly push them further, and what it actually looks like to do the work on yourself while your child is still out there struggling. Sally asks one question of every mom she works with, and I think it will stay with you.

If your child has asked for space, cut contact, or simply drifted somewhere you cannot reach, this one is for you.

You’ll learn:

• The coping mechanism Sally reached for and what finally made her put it down for good
• Why honoring a requested pause is harder than it sounds, and what happens when we do not
• What Sally means by "father wounds" and how often they show up in the families she works with
• The one question she asks every mom she coaches, and why the answer changes everything
• A practical tool she calls a personal board of directors, and why your friends probably should not be on it.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Sally Harris YouTube Channel
• Sally Harris website

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

Tough love. Two words that get thrown around constantly in the addiction world, and yet nobody can quite agree on what they mean. Kick them out. Cut them off. Save yourself. That’s the version I heard early on, and I couldn’t do it. Not because I was too soft, but because something about it felt fundamentally wrong - especially with a teenager.

In this episode, Cathy and I get practical on the topic of this illusive thing called “tough love.” We walk through the nine actual actions we took with our own kids, in order, from the very first steps all the way to the hardest ones (ones we call “strong love”) as a way of demonstrating action, not theories. Just two moms who were figuring it out as we went, without the language, community or support we needed at the time.

YOU’LL LEARN:

• What Dr. Gabor Maté said about tough love that stopped me cold
• Why I stopped using the phrase “tough love” and what I call it instead
• Nine “strong love” actions Cathy and I took with our own kids, and what we wish we had done differently
• The thing every person in recovery has told me about what finally changed things for them
• The two books I recommend to every parent, no matter where you are in this

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Heather Hayes on Hopestream episode 111
• Mary Crocker Cook on Hopestream episode 223
• Jessica Lahey on Hopestream episode 163
• Trish Ruggles on Hopestream episode 313
• Safe Enough To Change course in Hopestream Community’s Limited Membership

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When I first heard about a woodworking apprenticeship as an addiction recovery program, I was skeptical. And then I sat down with Jeremy French, founder of Making Whole in Asheville, North Carolina, and everything I thought I knew about what recovery has to look like got turned on its head.

Jeremy got sober at 17 after stolen cars, drug runs to Florida, and a flop house he describes as straight out of a Netflix series. He's been in recovery nearly 30 years, never finished high school, and built one of the most remarkable programs I've come across. A small group of men of all ages build high-end furniture together, share a daily meal, and are never forced to stay.

Of the 55 men who've graduated from Making Whole since 2018, 30 of them will tell you they are exactly where they want to be today. That is not a number you hear in this space. I was so intrigued.

You'll hear about:

• Why Jeremy credits drugs with solving nine out of ten problems in his life while he was using, and what that might mean for your child
• The two things true in every recovery success story Jeremy has witnessed, without exception
• The decision his parents made that changed his life more than anything else
• Why stepping back sends a different message than you think
• What addiction is actually solving, and why treating it as the problem keeps everyone stuck
• What parents who have lost a child would give anything to do, and what that could mean for you right now

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Making Whole website

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

This solo episode is my attempt to provide answers to the question of why some families see greater change than others when using the CRAFT approach. Drawing on 6+ years of watching hundreds of parents move through this process, some gaining traction, some spinning their wheels, I’m sharing the 10 most common reasons why parents who are 'doing the work' aren't getting the results they want. It's a no-fluff audit of what might be holding you back, and it comes from my heart because there are no more important results to strive for than a healthy family.

If you've been at this for a while and feel like things aren't moving in the right direction, this one is for you.

You'll hear about:

• A foundational piece most parents skip without realizing it
• Why doing more often backfires
• A timing factor that determines whether any skill works
• The fastest path forward when communication has broken down
• Why inconsistency isn't a character flaw

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Hopestream Playlists - Start Here Playlist
• Jennifer Ollis Blomqvist on using Motivational Interviewing, Hopestream episode 306
• Dr. Emily Kline on using Motivational Interviewing for hard conversations, Hopestream episode 160
• Using Motivational Interviewing and CRAFT as a double punch effort to create change in your family, Hopestream episode 256
• CRAFT family resources and providers with Helping Families Help
• Using CRAFT, MI and Acceptance & Commitment Therapy together to help your child, Hopestream episode 260
• Stages of Change workshop
• Stages of Change downloadable cheat-sheet here
• Hopestream podcast episode 66 on the Stages of Change

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When parents hear "wilderness therapy," their minds often race to worst-case scenarios: punishment, boot camps, kids forced to survive in harsh conditions. But Trish Ruggles, who spent over a decade as a field guide and wilderness therapist before becoming an educational consultant, has a different story to tell. After 21 years in the field and working with countless families through Pathfinder Consulting, Trish knows that wilderness therapy has evolved dramatically from its origins.

What makes wilderness therapy effective isn't the outdoor skills or fresh air - though those certainly help. It's magic lies in the complete removal of 'noise.'

When you take a struggling adolescent out of their always-on life and place them in the wilderness, the volume goes down on everything that keeps them from thriving. No bedroom door to close, no delivery apps to summon food, no distractions to buffer the work of actually facing themselves. And there are immediate, natural consequences their adolescent brain can actually understand.

Trish's approach is refreshingly honest and practical. She'll be the first to tell you wilderness therapy isn't for everyone, but for the kid who's stuck in their room, the one running wild in the streets, or the treatment-experienced individual who knows how to game the residential system, wilderness creates something that can't be replicated indoors: a space where you can't phone it in, where every action impacts your group, and where real-life consequences teach more than any lecture ever could.

You'll learn:

• Key myths and facts about today's outdoor behavioral health offerings
• The critical, natural consequences that wilderness experiences provide in real-time
• How wilderness has evolved from its primitive roots
• Why adopted kids and those with attachment challenges often thrive in wilderness despite parents' fears
• The truth about getting kids to agree to, and actually go to an outdoor, adventure or wilderness program

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Website Trish Ruggles
• Trish on Hopestream episode 202
• Will White’s Hopestream podcast episode 14

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When Campbell Manning's middle son entered detox the day before Valentine's Day, she genuinely believed he'd be "fixed" and home within a week. What followed instead was a years-long journey through both of her sons' addiction cycles that would ultimately transform her from a completely naive parent into a trained addiction counselor who now helps hundreds of families navigate the same treacherous terrain.

Campbell brings both the raw authenticity of lived experience and the clinical expertise she's gained through extensive education plus real-world training with Amber Hollingsworth (Put The Shovel Down YouTube Channel) at Hope For Families Recovery Center.

In this potent conversation, she speaks directly to the particular torture of watching your child actively harm themselves while grappling with decisions that feel impossible, like when her 14-year-old daughter confronted her about how much more "time, emotion, money, and energy" she was going to give to addiction.

What I love is that Campbell's wisdom isn't theoretical; it's forged from setting boundaries that ended up with her sons leave home at 17, refusing to enable behavior that was metastasizing through her entire family system, and learning that "over-loving" your child can actually be the most deleterious choice you make. Her message offers genuine hope grounded in reality: both her sons are in long-term recovery, and she's built a thriving coaching practice helping parents understand that their child's willingness to change often arrives in fleeting moments, which means your preparation and readiness matters profoundly.

You'll learn:

• How Campbell navigated the brutal reality of having two sons in active addiction, including the crucial difference between heartbreak (first son) and fury (second son) in her emotional responses
• The concept of "tagging it on" and why your child must truly understand there's no one coming to rescue them before lasting change becomes possible
• Why disenfranchised grief - the kind that receives no casseroles, no sympathy cards, no community support, coagulates within families dealing with addiction and impacts every member, especially siblings
• How Campbell's daughter's confrontation about "how much more are you going to give addiction, Mom?" catalyzed her understanding that setting strong, healthy boundaries isn't abandonment, it's the most loving thing you can do when your child is drowning

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Hope For Families Recovery Center website
• Put The Shovel Down YouTube Channel

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.