Optimising Your Brilliance: Enabling Calm, Confident, Strategic Leadership Podcast By Estelle Read Leadership Coach Bestselling Author Speaker and Founder of Beee cover art

Optimising Your Brilliance: Enabling Calm, Confident, Strategic Leadership

Optimising Your Brilliance: Enabling Calm, Confident, Strategic Leadership

By: Estelle Read Leadership Coach Bestselling Author Speaker and Founder of Beee
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Lead strategically with calm confidence with Estelle Read, Bestselling Author, Coach, Speaker, and guests. Optimising Your Brilliance is the toolkit for leaders ready to break performance ceilings and achieve next level results. You will get science-backed strategies and mindset shifts to tackle imposter syndrome, workaholism, anxiety, and self-sabotage. We’ll help you reduce your workload, reclaim your time, and provide stress relief to heal from burnout. We’ll also share tools to clarify your strategic direction and deliver the brilliant results you're capable of. EstelleRead.comEstelle Read, Leadership Coach, Bestselling Author, Speaker and Founder of Beee Economics Management Management & Leadership
Episodes
  • Assertiveness for Leaders: Breaking the People-Pleasing Pattern

    Assertiveness for Leaders: Breaking the People-Pleasing Pattern
    Mar 24 2026
    Did you know your brain processes a 'social rejection'exactly like physical pain? That's why saying 'no' to your boss feels like a survival threat. Today, I'm showing you how to re-wire that response.In this miniseries episode, I explore the Please Me Patternand why people-pleasing behaviour keeps you trapped in cycles of overcommitment, resentment, and burnout. I share the neuroscience behind why rejection feels like physical pain, reveal a powerful client breakthrough with a narcissistic boss, and give you practical tools to set boundaries without guilt. Whether you struggle to say no at work or find yourself constantly organising everything for everyone, this episode will show you how to break free from people-pleasing for good. What You Will Learn:💡 Why your brain treats rejection like touching a hot stove - and how this survival mechanism keeps you saying yes when you should say no 💡 The exact moment a people-pleasing lawyer stood up to her manipulative boss and what happened next (spoiler: no consequences, just respect) 💡 A simple four-letter framework for giving difficult feedback that protects your boundaries while maintaining relationships Here’s to your leadership development and personal growth! Estelle Read Bestselling Author, Executive Coach & Speaker Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction: This Stops People Pleasing(02:47) The Please Me Pattern: Why saying no feelsterrifying(03:27) The lawyer who couldn't stop pleasing people(03:51) The drowning man analogy(04:41) Core fear: Rejection and abandonment(05:10) Why we can't survive without parental love(06:13) Rejection activates the same brain area as physicalpain(07:18) Childhood origins of people-pleasing behaviour(09:16) How people-pleasing shows up at work(10:11) The imbalance in relationships and resentment(12:28) Developing your inner captain vs inner critic(15:01) Client story: The people-pleaser at flight risk(16:15) Using havening to find the root cause(17:48) The breakthrough: Standing up to the narcissisticboss(18:48) How boundaries transformed her friendships too(19:39) The mindset shift: Self-validation and journaling(20:41) Assertiveness training: Ken and Kate Back(21:16) Getting rid of people-pleasing triggers withhavening(22:00) The SBI+R model for difficult feedback(23:20) Setting clear boundaries and raising awareness(24:32) Micro action: Assertive phrases for your back pocket(25:12) Resources: Run a Tight Ship chapter(25:58) Next episode: The Be Perfect Pattern(26:10) Subscribe and connect with me⭐Help Us Keep Growing & Going:If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe whereveryou listen or watch, leave a review or share it with someone who might benefit. Thank you ❤️. ⭐Listen or Watch on YouTube:🎧Listen on your favourite podcast platform here: https://estelleread.com/podcast/📺Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@EstelleRead/podcasts ⭐Follow Estelle Read: https://linktr.ee/EstelleAtBeee ⭐Access Resources or Book a Free Discovery Call:⁠https://estelleread.com/resources/⁠ ⭐Estelle Read’s Coaching Programmes:🌟⁠The Resilient Leader Programme: SHINE⁠🌟⁠The Optimised Leader Programme: NEXT LEVEL⁠ ⭐Buy Estelle Read’s Bestselling Book:⁠Inner Brilliance, Outer Shine: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism and Stress ⁠ ⭐Subscribe to Estelle Read’s Blog: ⁠Receive my free workbook: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism & Stress,when you sign up. ⁠ ⭐Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and shouldnot be considered professional advice. Please consult a qualified professional for specific advice.
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    28 mins
  • How to Break the "Hurry Up" Habit and Reduce Stress

    How to Break the "Hurry Up" Habit and Reduce Stress
    Mar 17 2026
    Do you catch yourself rushing through tasks or finishingother people's sentences? In this episode, we explore why your brain equates speed with safety and how the "Hurry Up" habit is quietly sabotaging your productivity, relationships, and mental health.As part of our miniseries on Adrienne Lee’s “DrowningPerson” model (Transactional Analysis), I’m sharing my personal journey from a high-speed HR leader to reclaiming my peace. Discover the childhood origins of your need for urgency, recognise the warning signs of "Rush Mode,"and learn practical strategies to slow down to speed up yourresults without sacrificing success.What You Will Learn:💡 The Biology of Speed: Why your brain treats slowness as a "danger signal"and keeps you trapped in a constant fight-or-flight state.💡 Childhood Programming: How early messages equating speed with competence create adult patterns of anxiety and hurried decisions.💡 Practical Tools for Calm: From the "School Run Walk of Shame" to the 7-11 Breathing Technique and the 4-3-2 Sensory Exercise.Whether you're balancing a career, family, or personalgrowth, this episode reveals why doing things quickly often backfires - and how to finally break the cycle. Tune in for next week's episode on how to overcome the ‘Pleasing’ patten. Here’s to your leadership development and personal growth! Estelle Read Bestselling Author, Coach & Speaker Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction (01:55) The Hurry Up Pattern Explained(03:12) Core Fear: Missing Something Crucial(03:41) Personal Example: Balancing Retirement & Business(04:33) Origins: Urgency as a Safety Signal(05:01) Childhood Patterns from Parents(05:21) My Confession: Creating This Pattern in My Daughter(06:02) Parenting Stress: The School Run "Walk of Shame"(07:13) How This Pattern Affects Children(08:19) Problems in Adulthood: Rushed Decisions & Mistakes(09:30) DISC Profile Connection(11:15) Mental Health Impact: Baseline Stress(12:37) Warning Signs(13:02) Example: HR Leadership: Breaking the "Rush Mode" Cycle(14:23) How Coaching Transformed My Hurry Up Pattern(14:47) Six Weeks in a Mindfulness Shed(15:35) Learning to Eat Mindfully(16:48) Philly the Pheasant: Slowing Down at Lunch(17:59) Speaking Career: From Horse Commentator to Impactful Presenter(18:44) The Transformation: Disconnecting "Slow = Bad"(19:33) The Opposite Truth About Speed & Intelligence(20:20) Strategies for Overcoming in Adulthood(21:13) Tools: Micro Pauses (22:07) 7-11 Breathing Technique forInstant Calm(22:28) Mindfulness: The 4-3-2 Sensory Exercise(25:20) Scheduling Buffer Times(25:46) Resources: Mindfulness Apps & Havening(26:11) Next Episode Preview: The Please Me Pattern(26:28) Outro & Call to Action ⭐Help Us Keep Growing & Going:If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe whereveryou listen or watch, leave a review or share it with someone who might benefit. Thank you ❤️. ⭐Listen or Watch on YouTube:🎧Listen on your favourite podcast platform here: https://estelleread.com/podcast/📺Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@EstelleRead/podcasts ⭐Follow Estelle Read: https://linktr.ee/EstelleAtBeee ⭐Access Resources or Book a Free Discovery Call: ⁠https://estelleread.com/resources/⁠ ⭐Estelle Read’s Coaching Programmes:🌟⁠The Resilient Leader Programme: SHINE⁠🌟⁠The Optimised Leader Programme: NEXT LEVEL⁠ ⭐Buy Estelle Read’s Bestselling Book:⁠Inner Brilliance, Outer Shine: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism and Stress ⁠ ⭐Subscribe to Estelle Read’s Blog: ⁠Receive my free workbook: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism & Stress, when you sign up. ⁠ ⭐Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and shouldnot be considered professional advice. Please consult a qualified professional for specific advice.
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    28 mins
  • How to Stop Overworking: Breaking the "Try Hard" Cycle of Burnout

    How to Stop Overworking: Breaking the "Try Hard" Cycle of Burnout
    Mar 10 2026
    Are you stuck in a cycle of relentless effort but feel likeyou're never doing enough? In this episode, we explore how the "Try Hard" habit fuels chronic overworking, perfectionism, and burnout.Discover the exact childhood messages driving your need toprove your worth today and learn how this unconscious pattern, (part of Adrienne Lee’s “Drowning Person” model in Transactional Analysis), might actually be sabotaging your professional success.What You Will Learn:💡 Discover why trying hard might be sabotaging your success and pushing people away instead of impressing them 💡 Learn the childhood origins of the "try hard" pattern and how unconscious messages from your past are driving your overwork today 💡 Get actionable strategies to break the cycle including delegation techniques, time-blocking methods, and the gold standard approach for automatic behaviour change Tune in next week for the Hurry Up pattern. Here’s to your leadership development and personal growth! Estelle Read Bestselling Author, Coach & Speaker Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction - Why trying hard is your enemy(01:45) The try hard pattern explained(03:30) Core fear of being deemed lazy or inadequate(05:05) Where the try hard pattern comes from(06:09) Childhood drivers and unconscious messages(07:32) Adult problems caused by trying hard(08:00) Client story: Academic inadequacy and imposter syndrome(10:53) Client transformation results(12:25) Strategies for overcoming try hard(13:22) Mindset shift: Define what good enough is(14:18) Practical tools(18:18) Why willpower isn't enough: The role of Havening and EFT in burnout(18:52) Setting boundaries (19:44) Micro action(20:22) Resources (21:26) The next episode: The Hurry Up pattern⭐Help Us Keep Growing & Going:If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe whereveryou listen or watch, leave a review or share it with someone who might benefit. Thank you ❤️. ⭐Listen or Watch on YouTube:🎧Listen on your favourite podcast platform here: https://estelleread.com/podcast/📺Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@EstelleRead/podcasts ⭐Follow Estelle Read: https://linktr.ee/EstelleAtBeee ⭐Access Resources or Book a Free Discovery Call:⁠https://estelleread.com/resources/⁠ ⭐Estelle Read’s Coaching Programmes:🌟⁠The Resilient Leader Programme: SHINE⁠🌟⁠The Optimised Leader Programme: NEXT LEVEL⁠ ⭐Buy Estelle Read’s Bestselling Book:⁠Inner Brilliance, Outer Shine: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism and Stress ⁠ ⭐Subscribe to Estelle Read’s Blog: ⁠Receive my free workbook: 10 Antidotes to Imposter Syndrome, Workaholism & Stress,when you sign up. ⁠ ⭐Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and shouldnot be considered professional advice. Please consult a qualified professional for specific advice.
    Show more Show less
    24 mins
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