When a child says, “This is who I am,” what does a supportive parent do next?

In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline take on a topic many families are trying to understand with more care and less fear: gender identity, sexual orientation, pronouns, transition, and the language kids and teens may be using right now.

This conversation starts the way real parenting conversations often do — with jokes, peanut butter confessions, hummingbirds, and everyday life — then moves into something many parents are quietly wrestling with: how to respond when a child, teen, friend, teacher, or family member shares something personal about who they are.

Caroline walks through key terms like cisgender, transgender, gender identity, gender expression, agender, bisexual, pansexual, Two-Spirit, transition, and more, using a resource called the Gender Unicorn and materials from Trans Student Educational Resources. Andrew brings the parent lens many listeners will relate to: wanting to be respectful, wanting to understand, and wanting to get it right without pretending to know everything.

This episode is a reminder that kids do not need a perfect speech from us. They need openness. They need respect. They need adults who can pause, stay curious, and listen without shutting them down.

If you’ve been trying to support a child or teen through questions around identity, or you want better language for conversations at home, this episode will help you start.

In this episode:

• the difference between gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation
• why validation matters so much for kids and teens
• how parents can respond with curiosity instead of panic
• why respect matters even when a parent is still learning
• resources that can help families keep the conversation going

Homework activities for adults

1. Practise the pause

When your child says something surprising, don’t rush to correct, debate, or explain. Take a breath and answer with calm interest.

Try saying:

• “Thanks for telling me.”
• “I want to understand.”
• “Tell me more about that.”
• “What would feel supportive from me right now?”

Resource needed:
A short list of go-to response lines saved in your phone or written on a note in the kitchen.

2. Learn the basic language

Pick 10 terms from this episode and learn what they mean. Not to sound polished. Just to be less reactive and more informed.

Start with:
gender identity, gender expression, sex assigned at birth, cisgender, transgender, transition, agender, bisexual, pansexual, Two-Spirit

Resource needed:

• Gender Unicorn
• Trans Student Educational Resources (TSER) glossary or terminology page

3. Ask your child what respect looks like to them

Not every child wants the same kind of support. Some want privacy. Some want language to help them talk. Some want you to use a different name or pronouns. Some just want you not to panic.

Try asking:

• “What would help you feel supported by me?”
• “Is there anything you want me to say differently?”
• “Who knows, and who would

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How do parents build a village when they’re raising kids far from family?
In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline dig into one of the hardest parts of modern parenting: feeling alone while trying to raise connected, confident kids.

From neighbours and school families to sports teams, gyms, dog parks, and simple daily routines, they talk about how community is built in real life — not through grand gestures, but through small repeated moments. A wave across the street. A favour for a neighbour. A shared ride to practice. A standing dinner with friends. The kind of connection that grows slowly, then suddenly feels solid.

They also get honest about how much family life has changed in Canada: smaller households, more distance from grandparents, more seniors living alone, and more parents trying to do it all without the built-in support previous generations often had.

This episode is for parents who have moved away from home, feel isolated, or want to create stronger ties for their children and teens. It’s a grounded conversation about rebuilding community, modelling connection, and giving kids something every family needs: people they can count on.

Listen in for practical ideas on:

• how to build a village when you’re starting from scratch
• why neighbours still matter
• how sports, school, and local routines can create real connection
• why online connection doesn’t fully replace in-person community
• how parents can model belonging for children and teens

Perfect for: parents of kids, tweens, and teens; families new to a city; parents dealing with loneliness; anyone trying to raise children with stronger community ties.

Homework activities for adults to support children and teens, plus resources needed

1. Learn the names of five neighbours

What to do:
Over the next two weeks, make a point of learning the names of at least five people who live nearby. Say hello when you see them. Keep it simple and warm.

Why it helps kids and teens:
Children notice who their adults trust, greet, and feel comfortable around. That helps them feel safer and more rooted where they live.

Resources needed:

• phone notes app or small notebook
• ten minutes during walks, school drop-off, or after work

2. Start one repeat family routine in the community

What to do:
Pick one regular outing at the same time each week: dog park, local café, library, rec centre, walking route, skating rink, gym, farmers’ market.

Why it helps kids and teens:
Familiar faces turn into friendly faces. Repetition builds comfort, and comfort makes connection easier.

Resources needed:

• calendar
• one local spot
• a realistic time you can keep most weeks

3. Offer one small favour to another family

What to do:
Send a message or say in person: “If you ever need mail picked up, a quick school pickup, or someone to check on the house, let us know.”

Why it helps kids and teens:
Kids grow up seeing support as something people give and receive, not somethi

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A jar of peanut butter almost ends a marriage… and somehow becomes the perfect opener for a conversation about what’s happening to adolescence right now.

In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline unpack what ADHD expert Dr. Russell Barkley calls “early arrival, late departure”: kids hitting adult ideas sooner (thanks, screens) while independence shows up later (thanks, anxiety, money, and over-helping). They talk milestones that are fading (driving, first jobs, even babysitting), why “checklist parenting” can quietly shrink confidence, and what it looks like to raise teens who can handle inconvenience, criticism, and disappointment without melting down.

You’ll leave with practical ways to step back without checking out: handing over real-life tasks (appointments, banking, transit), modelling purposeful phone use, and trying Stephen Covey’s “Green and Clean” method to build responsibility at home—without turning your house into a nag-fest.

Keywords: parenting teens, adolescence, Gen Z, Gen Alpha, screen time, executive function, independence, ADHD, Russell Barkley, life skills, overparenting, helicopter parenting, snowplow parenting, “curling” parenting, rites of passage, resilience.

Homework activities for adults (to support kids/teens) + resources

Homework 1: The “Say it out loud” phone habit (7 days)

Every time you pick up your phone near your kids, narrate your purpose in one sentence:
“I’m checking the weather.” “I’m texting Grandma back.” “I’m doing Duolingo.”
Kids copy what they think we’re doing—this makes your use visible and intentional.

Resource: create a note on your phone titled “Why I’m on my phone” with 6–8 common reasons so it’s easy to stick with.

Homework 2: Hand over one real-world task this week

Pick one:

• book a dentist/doctor appointment
• call the bank about a card issue
• plan a transit route to the mall/friend’s house
• order their own replacement item online (with a budget)

Your job: be nearby, don’t do the talking, don’t grab the phone “to speed it up.”

Resource: a simple script card in Notes:

• “Hi, my name is ___.”
• “I need to ___.”
• “My availability is ___.”
• “Can you repeat that?”
• “Thanks, have a good day.”

Homework 3: Build frustration tolerance on purpose (tiny reps)

Once this week, don’t rescue a minor inconvenience:

• let them re-pack the forgotten item
• let them email the teacher about a missed deadline
• let them solve the “wrong bus / wrong stop” problem with you on standby

Aim for small stakes. The win is practice, not perfection.

Resource: family phrase to repeat: “Try three ways, then ask.”

Homework 4: “Green and Clean” at home (one job, one standard)

Give one household job with a clear finish line.
No step-by-step coaching. Let them decide how to do it.

Resource: Stephen Covey “Green and Clean” — search YouTube: “Green and Clean Stephen Covey”.

Homework 5: Create a rite of passage (low drama, high meaning)

Pick a milestone you can bring back:

• solo transit to a familiar place
• managing a monthly bu

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