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🚨THE CATCHPHRASE DRAFT, DAD JOKES & A DANGEROUS “WHAT WOULD YOU DO?” SCENARIO🚨

This week on The Pour Choices Show, we dive into the power of iconic quotes, and immediately ruin it with dad jokes and life decisions that absolutely should not be crowdsourced.

We kick things off with a Dad Joke of the Day that sets the tone (low), followed by a completely unexplained PSA about loyalty. From there, we ask the important questions society refuses to answer… like what color a Smurf turns when you choke it, and what things people pretend are a choice that absolutely aren’t.

Then reality sets in.

Chris gives updates on his rapidly escalating terrarium obsession (including new moss that he’s way too excited about), while both hosts come to terms with the fact that they are pushing 40 and officially entering the “this might be it” phase of life. We also uncover that half of people can’t intentionally blur their own vision, which somehow becomes a full conversation.

Things spiral when David presents a scenario about faking your job for 8 months and finally hitting the point where you can’t fake it anymore. Do you come clean, or double down and hope for the best?

From there, it’s chaos:

• Chris self-diagnoses a growing lump behind his ear (WebMD says “probably fine”)
• Would You Rather scenarios that get uncomfortable fast
• Why grammar matters more than you think (and can accidentally propose a foursome)
• Guessing which athlete posted wild tweets (spoiler: it’s always Le’Veon Bell)
• The Catchphrase Draft, breaking down the most iconic lines in pop culture

We wrap it up with word association, unhinged AskReddit questions, and a “This Day in History” segment where Chris continues his streak of confidently incorrect guesses.

It’s pop culture, dumb games, existential panic, and a deep dive into why certain phrases stick in your brain forever.

If you like comedy podcasts with chaotic energy, viral-style debates, ridiculous hypotheticals, and conversations that somehow go from grammar to life decisions in 30 seconds… you’re in the right place.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE ONE OF THESE CATCHPHRASES GETS STUCK IN YOUR HEAD 👇

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
4:06 – DAD JOKE OF THE DAY
6:18 – “NEVER QUESTION MY LOYALTY” PSA
7:04 – WHAT COLOR DOES A SMURF TURN?
8:12 – THINGS SOCIETY PRETENDS ARE A CHOICE
10:04 – WEEKLY UPDATES
17:12 – PUSHING 40
21:07 – BLURRED VISION
22:43 – WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
25:59 – CYST-ER FROM ANOTHER MR.
32:19 – WOULD YOU RATHER…
38:42 – GUESS THE CHARACTER FROM THE CONCEPT ART
46:07 – WHY GRAMMAR MATTERS (A LOT)
47:46 – GUESS THE ATHLETE TWEETS
51:37 – THE CATCHPHRASE DRAFT
1:00:39 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:04:39 – WORD ASSOCIATION GAME
1:07:47 – ASK REDDIT – $100M TRADEOFF SCENARIO
1:11:18 – ASK REDDIT – DATING AN IDIOT
1:17:37 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:20:04 – THIS DAY IN HISTORY
1:24:06 – OUTRO

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🚨 GUESSING CELEBRITIES BY THEIR REAL NAMES, PERIODIC TABLE TRIVIA & THE GREATEST SIDEKICKS OF ALL TIME 🚨

This week on The Pour Choices Show, we start with one of the greatest guitar riffs ever written and somehow end up debating the most influential person in human history.

Chris kicks things off talking about the legendary riff from “Welcome Home” by Coheed and Cambria, before David immediately throws him into chaos by asking him to name the Top 5 Black people of all time.

From there things spiral fast.

Chris reads David the real names of famous celebrities and forces him to guess who they are, which proves that some of Hollywood’s biggest stars had names that absolutely would not have worked on a movie poster.

We also debate the most influential person of all time, discuss why some people “run hot” like human space heaters, and revisit the universal frustration of trying to avoid conversation only to run into every neighbor in your apartment complex.

Other highlights include:
- Trying to figure out how you’d handcuff a one-armed man
- Chris proudly discussing his new Marlin 1895 Dark Series rifle like it’s 1887
- A hidden iPhone trick that explains laundry tag symbols
- Exploring the absurd subreddit r/BrandNewSentence where the internet produces phrases no human should ever say
- David guessing elements from Periodic Table symbols
- The Sidekick Draft, ranking the greatest sidekicks ever from movies, TV, and pop culture
- Chris continuing to financially spiral into the terrarium hobby rabbit hole

We also break down one of baseball’s strangest rumors involving Moises Alou, debate ridiculous injuries people have suffered, and wrap up with unwritten life rules people swear by.

It’s pop culture trivia, internet chaos, life hacks, dumb games, and two grown men arguing about science, celebrities, and sidekicks like it’s an Olympic sport.

If you like comedy podcasts with weird trivia, ridiculous hypotheticals, pop culture debates, and conversations that go from guitar riffs to history lessons in five minutes… you’re in the right place.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE WE SPEND MORE MONEY ON TERRARIUMS 👇

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
1:58 – THE RIFF
3:05 – TOP 5 BLACK PEOPLE OF ALL TIME DEBATE
5:35 – GUESS THE CELEBRITY FROM THEIR REAL NAME
12:52 – WHY COME PEOPLE “RUN HOT”
16:02 – WHO IS THE MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON EVER?
17:37 – AVOIDING PEOPLE AT ALL COSTS
21:37 – HOW DO YOU HANDCUFF A ONE-ARMED MAN?
22:35 – MARLIN 1895 DARK SERIES
28:04 – HIDDEN IPHONE TRICK FOR LAUNDRY TAGS
29:33 – r/BRANDNEWSENTENCE
34:22 – GUESSING ELEMENTS ON THE PERIODIC TABLE
39:32 – THE SIDEKICK DRAFT
43:15 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
44:13 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT IS THE DUMBEST WAY YOU’VE BEEN INJURED?­
49:00 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S AN UNWRITTEN RULE YOU SWEAR BY?
54:32 – 9
56:20 – MONEY WELL SPENT
1:00:27 – MOISES ALOU
1:02:39 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:06:00 – THIS DAY IN HISTORY
1:09:02 – OUTRO

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NUTTY PUTTY CAVE, HARRY POTTER SCREEN TIME & THE WEIRDEST QUESTIONS YOU’LL HEAR ALL WEEK!

This week on The Pour Choices Show, we go from arguing about whether gauze is secretly plural to telling one of the most disturbing real stories you’ve probably never heard… the tragedy of Nutty Putty Cave, where a man became trapped upside down in a 10” x 18” passage for 27 hours.

Naturally, after that emotional whiplash, things immediately spiral into the kinds of questions only two guys with microphones would ask each other:

· What would you yell in a crowd to find your friend without saying their name?

· Have you looked at every possible time on a clock during your lifetime?

· And if you had to drink an entire bottle of one bodily fluid… which are you picking?

Somewhere in the chaos we also revisit Little Monsters, remember the classic Nickelodeon Magazine PLEASE! commercial, and debate whether we should start collecting football cards again like it’s 1998.

Then things get nerdy in the best way when Chris tries to guess the Top 20 Harry Potter characters with the most screen time, which leads to arguments about who actually mattered in the movies and who just stood around Hogwarts looking dramatic.

We also talk about:

· Chris getting scammed by a counterfeit postage terrarium seller

· Words that only exist next to other words (like “torrential downpour”)

· The rumored disappearance of the penny

· A conspiracy that gravity might disappear on August 12th

· Supporting an employee’s dangerous caffeine addiction

· And the usual Try Not To Laugh dark jokes

It’s weird news, nostalgic pop culture, random trivia, conspiracy talk, and the kind of ridiculous hypotheticals that make you question how we function in society.

If you like comedy podcasts full of bizarre questions, pop culture debates, dumb games, and conversations that jump from horrifying cave stories to Harry Potter trivia… you’re in the right place.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE GRAVITY DISAPPEARS 👇

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
5:09 – IS GAUZE PLURAL? CHRIS THINKS SO
6:24 – THE NUTTY PUTTY CAVE TRAGEDY
10:01 – HOW WOULD YOU FIND ME IN A CROWD?
11:25 – THE WORST BODILY FLUID CHALLENGE
12:42 – HAVE YOU SEEN EVERY TIME ON A CLOCK?
14:35 – REDISCOVERING LITTLE MONSTERS
17:11 – TRY NOT TO LAUGH (DARK JOKES)
21:23 – COUNTERFEIT POSTAGE
26:31 – SHOULD WE START COLLECTING FOOTBALL CARDS AGAIN?
28:25 – WORDS THAT ONLY EXIST WITH OTHER WORDS
31:22 – SUPPORTING SUBORDINATE ADDICTIONS
34:03 – “NICKELODEON MAGAZINE PLEASE!”
35:32 – TOP 20 HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS BY SCREEN TIME
42:42 – IS THE PENNY FINALLY GOING AWAY?
46:32 – THE GRAVITY CONSPIRACY
48:44 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
50:02 – ASK REDDIT – WOULD YOU QUIT YOUR JOB FOR $2 MILLION
53:22 – ASK REDDIT – NORMAL THINGS YOU DIDN’T REALIZE WERE WEIRD
1:01:04 – CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS
1:07:01 – OUTRO

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🚨 SECRET MALL APARTMENTS, OLYMPIC DRAMA & A $10M MALL SURVIVAL CHALLENGE 🚨
This week on The Pour Choices Show, we somehow go from prairie dogs and boa constrictors to Winter Olympic politics, protein marketing conspiracies, and the psychological warfare that is modern grocery store layouts.

Chris kicks things off after seeing a guy with pet prairie dogs, which somehow reminds David of a stand-up bit involving a boa constrictor worn like Britney Spears at the VMAs. From there, we pivot into the U.S.A. hockey team taking gold over Canada, Olympic trivia, banned countries, and the ongoing chaos that is international competition.

Then it gets weird in the best way.

We debate what color each day of the week is, question why Snoop Dogg is selling gold coins with his own face on them, and break down whether you shop for groceries by a list or by surrendering to the store’s manipulative layout strategy. Chris also rants about protein being slapped onto every product like it’s a personality trait. Chris rediscovers a list of completely random words in his notes and has no idea what they were for. Naturally, this leads into a game of “Guess the Movie from the Wrong Characters”, where plots get explained using actors’ roles from entirely different films.

Then we dive into the Netflix documentary Secret Mall Apartment, which sets up the ultimate hypothetical:

You get $10,000,000 if you can live secretly inside a mall for 4 years without being caught. How are you pulling it off?

From there, it’s pure nostalgia chaos with The Mall Draft, picking the best stores from late 90s/early 2000s mall culture, plus AskReddit prompts about random movie quotes and unethical life hacks.

It’s Olympic trivia, mall psychology, dad jokes, secret living strategies, and two grown men deeply analyzing retail layouts like it’s national security.

If you like comedy podcasts with nostalgic energy, absurd hypotheticals, clever games, and stories that start normal and end in a hidden mall apartment… welcome home.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE THE MALL SECURITY CAMERAS FIND US 👇

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
1:32 – PRAIRIE DOGS & BOA CONSTRICTORS
5:08 – U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
8:07 – WINTER OLYMPIC STATISTICS
12:13 – BANNED FROM THE OLYMPICS
15:03 – WHAT COLOR IS EACH DAY OF THE WEEK?
17:27 – GOLDD
18:21 – DO YOU SHOP FOR GROCERIES BY THE LIST OR THE WAY THE STORE IS ARRANGED?
20:41 – PROTEIN IN EVERYTHING!
23:02 – CHRIS’S CRYPTOGRAPHIC CYPHER
26:03 – GUESS THE MOVIE FROM THE WRONG CHARACTERS
29:58 – WHAT GRINDS OUR GEARS
33:29 – SECRET MALL APARTMENT
37:18 – $1,000,000 CHALLENGE
42:28 – THE MALL DRAFT
49:32 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
52:15 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S A RANDOM MOVIE QUOTE THAT YOU REPEAT FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER?
59:57 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE MOST UNETHICAL LIFE HACK?
1:10:16 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:12:21 – OUTRO

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🚨 HARRY POTTER PLOT HOLES, LIGHTNING MCQUEEN INSURANCE & PETS DOING STUPID THINGS 🚨
This week on The Pour Choices Show, we start by debating whether “pronunciate” is a real word, spiral into Chris’s full-blown Crazy Plant Guy arc, and somehow end up rewriting fictional law, infrastructure, and wizarding logic with absolute confidence.

Chris gives a terrarium update that feels suspiciously like a midlife crisis in soil form, while David revisits the now-infamous 20-foot angry chicken scenario because apparently no lesson was learned the first time. The strategy still isn’t better.

We then ask the hard-hitting cultural questions no one else will touch:

• Does Lightning McQueen have car insurance or life insurance?
• What is the gayest piece of infrastructure?
• How many Sesame Street tattoos are you getting for $10,000 each?

Things escalate when David unveils what might be the biggest Harry Potter plot hole ever, followed by full-blown “What If?” wizard scenarios that would absolutely get us banned from Hogwarts.

From there, it’s pure chaos:

• Guess Who – Harry Potter Edition.
• Regular Guess Who.
• Would You Rather.
• The Horse Draft (which includes Mustangs, Colts, and Sarah Jessica Parker because of course it does).
• AskReddit questions about what people underestimate and the dumbest things pets have done.

It’s nostalgia, pop culture debates, dumb games, and two grown men arguing about fictional physics like it’s a congressional hearing.

If you like comedy podcasts with chaotic energy, absurd hypotheticals, nerd arguments, and absolutely no conclusions… welcome home.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE A WIZARD FACT-CHECKS US 👇

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
3:00 – PRONUNCIATE vs ANNUNCIATE
4:15 – CRAZY PLANT GUY
6:35 – REVISITING THE CHICKEN
8:05 – WHAT IS THE GAYEST PIECE OF INFRASTRUCTURE?
10:39 – DOES LIGHTING MCQUEEN HAVE CAR INSURANCE OR LIFE INSURANCE?
12:20 – SESAME STREET TATTOOS
15:41 – ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY
19:36 – THE BIGGEST PLOT HOLE IN HARRY POTTER
20:37 – R.I.P. MR. KEYES
24:02 – HARRY POTTER “WHAT-IF’S”
28:54 – GUESS WHO – HARRY POTTER EDITION
35:14 – GUESS WHO
49:54 – WOULD YOU RATHER
54:41 – THE HORSE DRAFT
1:00:40 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:02:25 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT IS FAR MORE THAN PEOPLE REALIZE?
1:08:21 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT’S THE STUPIDEST THING YOU’VE EVER SEEN YOUR PET DO?
1:13:40 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:17:07 – OUTRO

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🚨 DAVID’S WIFE FINALLY JOINS THE SHOW… AND IT GETS WEIRD FAST. 🚨
For the first time in 106 episodes, David’s wife makes her official debut on ThePourChoicesShow, and within minutes we’re asking the kind of questions that make you wonder how they’ve stayed married, employed, or allowed in public.

This episode is packed with ridiculous hypotheticals, nostalgic childhood games, and AskReddit prompts that immediately spiral into chaos. We debate whether Black History Month got shorted on purpose, attempt to hide pancakes in a bed like deranged breakfast burglars, and figure out how to survive a fight against a 20-foot angry chicken using a one-shot ray gun and a single 5-letter noun.

Then things take a hard turn into a game where David’s wife sends pictures of feminine products and we have to guess what they are… which goes exactly as poorly as you’d expect from two grown men who still argue about stairs.

We wrap it up with a series of AskReddit questions ranging from “what hobby attracts the most douchebags?” to the deeply unsettling hypothetical where orgasms turn you dark blue for 24 hours. (Yes, we talk about the implications. No, we don’t solve anything.)

If you like comedy podcasts with dumb games, wild hypotheticals, and the occasional reminder that adulthood is a scam, you’re in the right place.

👇 WATCH NOW BEFORE THIS EPISODE GETS US GROUNDED 👇

👍 Like if your mental age is still 17
🔔 Subscribe for weekly poor choices and worse logic
📤 Share this with someone who thinks they’re “mature”

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
3:56 – SPECIAL GUEST!
5:51 – BLACK HISTORY MONTH
7:36 – HOW MANY PANCAKES COULD YOU HIDE?
13:46 – POOH STICKS
18:18 – MAN VS CHICKEN
22:39 – 10,000 T’s
25:20 – STANDING BACKWARDS ON A FLIGHT OF STAIRS
26:49 – A DAY IN HER SHOES
41:00 – FINISH THE SENTENCE
57:34 – ASK REDDIT – BLUEGASMS
1:02:44 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT HOBBY ATTRACTS THE MOST DOUCHEBAGS?
1:12:19 – ASK REDDIT – HOW OLD ARE YOU & HOW OLD DO YOU FEEL MENTALLY?
1:20:16 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:22:30 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:27:27 – OUTRO­­

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UNHINGED HYPOTHETICALS, RACISTS TESTS, AND THE STINKY CHEESE MAN!
Unfortunately for you, we’re back with another episode of The Pour Choices Show where two grown men sit down with microphones and immediately prove why society shouldn’t let adults have free time. Things went off the rails before the first mic was even hot and within minutes we’re derailed by a wildly unnecessary “what color is Jamal?” brain teaser, followed by a heated argument about what “cryptic” actually means. Spoiler: we don’t know.

From unhinged $100M hypothetical challenges involving ketchup bottles and Harry Potter to a realization about a specific logo that left one host genuinely stunned, this episode of the Pour Choices Show is a fever dream of poor decisions and even poorer logic.

From there it gets worse (in the best way):

• David unveils an AI face-combo of two past guests that somehow becomes a plumbing joke
• Chris gives a terrarium update and admits he rage-quit crafting and just bought a prebuilt setup (Randy lives on)
• We debate if you’d crawl everywhere for 10 years for $10M, and whether rewriting Harry Potter with ketchup is a “couple years” problem or a “five-year mental breakdown” problem
• One host has a horrifying learning moment about the double lightning bolt symbol… and the other is stunned this is new information
• We run through Would You Rather prompts that go from practical to “maybe don’t say that out loud”
• We play Real or Fake Inventions, including a hangover predictor, a “this could’ve been an email” meeting translator, and a smartwatch vibe checker that politely tells you to shut up
• We review a bright green sour from Voodoo Brewing Company that gets described as “Shrek peed in your glass” and still scores a 9.45 because taste apparently matters more than dignity
• We close with the most petty AskReddit prompt ever: what would you wish on your worst enemy? (Flat sodas, carbonated milk, pebble-in-shoe misery… you know, the real evil)

If you like chaotic conversations, dark jokes, dumb games, and two friends confidently saying things they should’ve kept inside their skulls… this one’s for you.

Grab a drink, hit subscribe, and let’s get into the chaos.

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
2:05 – TALES FROM THE CRYPT
4:07 – SUPER MARIO, BRO
7:59 – CRAWLING TO THE BANK
10:12 – RE-WRITING HARRY POTTER WITH KETCHUP
13:58 – STINKY CHEESE MAN
18:31 – TRY NOT TO LAUGH
20:11 – TERRARIUM UPDATE
24:27 – HE HAS RESIN
26:20 – ROCKEN UND ROLEN DIE GANZE NACHT
30:07 – SHARON!
33:06 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
41:16 – REAL OR FAKE – INVENTIONS
48:02 – THE RACIST TEST
51:42 – GUESS THE GAME FROM THE MAP
59:24 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:03:15 – ASK REDDIT – $1,000,000 TO EAT THE LAST THING YOU ATE FOR 6 MONTHS, DO YOU DO IT?
1:07:14 – ASK REDDIT – WHAT WOULD YOU WISH ON YOUR WORST ENEMY?
1:17:37 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:19:41 – OUTRO

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🎉 TWO YEARS IN. STILL MAKING POUR CHOICES. 🎉

We hit our 2-year anniversary and celebrated the only way we know how: bad hypotheticals, worse opinions, and announcements that definitely should not be buried 45 minutes into a comedy podcast.

Two years of bad decisions, questionable logic, and absolute chaos have led us here. So, naturally, we’re diving straight into the deep end: from life-changing baby announcements to the wildest "Would You Rather" scenarios that will make you question your own sanity.

Why was Hulk Hogan’s gas tank a target at a Tampa strip club? Is the Helen Keller conspiracy actually plausible? And if you had to survive 30 days in a video game to become a billionaire in real life—which one are you picking? (Choose carefully, because if you die in the game, you're toast).

It’s a celebration episode.
So naturally, nothing is under control.

Grab a drink, hit that subscribe button, and let’s make some more Pour Choices.

Chapters

00:00 – INTRO
3:20 – JESUS WAS A PROPHET!?
4:56 – IF YOU COULD ADD ONE ZERO TO YOUR LIFE…
6:40 – WHAT LETTER WOULD YOU SLEEP ON?
9:43 – BRING YOUR ANIMAL TO WORK DAY
12:40 – WEST VIRGINIA
15:11 – RIDDLE ME THIS
16:56 – DIY T-SHIRTS
20:26 – ODYSSEY 2001
33:56 – BIG ANNOUNCEMENTS
35:16 – WOULD YOU RATHER?
44:09 – THE NEIGHBORHOOD TEA
48:31 – I.C.E., I.C.E. BABY
54:45 – THE HELEN KELLER CONSPIRACY
1:02:15 – SUPER BOWL TRIVIA
1:10:25 – THIS WEEK’S POUR CHOICES
1:13:58 – ASK REDDIT – SURVIVING IN A VIDEO GAME FOR 30 DAYS
1:23:16 – ASK REDDIT – WOMEN, WHAT ARE YOU ACTUALLY THINKING WHEN YOU CATCH A GUY LOOKING AT YOUR BOOBS?
1:27:35 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
1:36:10 – OUTRO

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WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
The Big Question: You have to survive 30 days in a video game. If you make it out, you keep all the money and superpowers. If you die, it’s game over for real. Which game are you choosing? Let us know in the comments!

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