Decoding Boys

New Science Behind the Subtle Art of Raising Sons

By: Cara Natterson

Narrated by: Cara Natterson

“If you’re raising a boy, you need this brilliant book. It is clear, wise, and eye-opening.” —Lisa Damour, Ph.D., author of Untangled

When boys enter puberty, they tend to get quiet—or at least quieter than before—and parents often misread their signals. Here’s how to navigate their retreat and steer them through this confusing passage, by the bestselling author of The Care and Keeping of You series and Guy Stuff: The Body Book for Boys.

What is my son doing behind his constantly closed door? What’s with his curt responses, impulsiveness, newfound obsession with gaming, and . . . that funky smell? As pediatrician and mother of two teenagers Cara Natterson explains, puberty starts in boys long before any visible signs appear, and that causes confusion about their changing temperaments for boys and parents alike. Often, they also grow quieter as they grow taller, which leads to less parent-child communication. But, as Natterson warns in Decoding Boys, we respect their increasing “need” for privacy, monosyllabic conversations, and alone time at their peril. Explaining how modern culture mixes badly with male adolescent biology, Natterson offers science, strategies, scripts, and tips for getting it right:

• recognizing the first signs of puberty and talking to our sons about the wide range of “normal” through the whole developmental process
• why teenagers make irrational decisions even though they look mature—and how to steer them toward better choices
• managing video game and screen time, including discussing the unrealistic and dangerous nature of pornography
• why boys need emotional and physical contact with parents—and how to give it in ways they’ll accept
• how to prepare boys to resist both old and new social pressures—drugs, alcohol, vaping, and sexting
• teaching consent and sensitivity in the #MeToo culture

Decoding Boys is a powerful and validating lifeline, a book that will help today’s parents keep their sons safe, healthy, and resilient, as well as ensure they will become emotionally secure young men.

Praise for Decoding Boys

“Comforting . . . a common-sensical and gently humorous exploration of male puberty's many trials.”—Kirkus Reviews

How relevant the data and info was

I loved how many tips were given backed by data and evidence. Will absolutely be reading this again- and probably again. A great tool to have in your back pocket

Essential read

As a mom and teacher of adolescents, this book is a must read for anyone raising or interacting regularly with kids. It is real, unapologetic, necessary. People are finally writing about boys, and it provides fantastic insight.

Gracias! Es una gran guía

Me ha iluminado mucho! En un mundo donde todos se enfocan en las niñas y dejan los cambios en los niños por detrás cuando son igual de importantes, este libro me ha iluminado mucho. Es una gran guía, es un libro directo y conciso. Narrado además con una dicción perfecta. Lo recomiendo mucho.

A good read before puberty

My son is already 14 years old, so a lot of the information was not useful to me, I did appreciate the 10 tips in the beginning, as that was still very useful to me and any boy at any age.

I wish I had read this before he hit puberty

GREAT guide for both parent and child

This book brought expertise, clarity, humor and personal experience to a subject that every boy experiences and few people understand. The author wastes no words, speaks at just the right speed, combines science with social issues, uses language that is both understandable and specific, and covers matters of real importance.
I would recommend it to every parent who has a son, as well as every boy who is starting or in the midst of puberty.