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Call me horny. These are the words of Captain Amber as she gazes out across the vast ocean, searching for Moby Butt. Years ago, Captain Amber and her living butt lover decided to play an erotic game of cat and mouse, but nobody could’ve expected it would turn into this. Despite protests from the crew, beautiful lesbian Captain Amber refuses to use her safe word and end this erotic scenario, but she’s about to learn the importance of playing in a responsible way, and that there’s nothing wrong or embarrassing about calling things off.

Collected within are seven of Chuck’s greatest lesbian works, breathtaking journeys through the world of classic literature that will melt your heart and get you off.

Gilly’s days are packed to the brim, stuffed with so many activities and events that it’s difficult for her to focus. Soon enough, this mounting anxiety begins to show up in frustrating ways. Fortunately, Gilly’s social plans for the evening are unexpectedly cancelled, and she soon finds herself with a block of hours dedicated to getting her to-do list done. However, when these cancelled plans physically manifest as a beautiful, hovering calendar named Olga, Gilly quickly realizes that her evening might be more action-packed than she initially thought.

Mona is on trial, and she’s absolutely terrified. After saying that chocolate milk is “better than sick water”, she’s being sued by water itself for a billion dollars. Fortunately, this food-and-beverage-based case is the perfect fit for her sentient macaroni and cheese lawyer, Hemma.

Vickibod Crame is new to the town of Sleepy Butthole, a recently hired schoolteacher who’s looking forward to calling this beautiful hamlet home. Unfortunately, she quickly discovers the townsfolk here are not as kind as she’s hoped. In fact, they’re downright rude. Now Vickibod is headed out to the old bridge on the night of a full moon, searching for the legendary headless buttwoman. It’s said this buttwoman once tried to turn Sleepy Butthole into a joyful place through voracious ass eating, but failed. Now Vickibod Crame is helping the headless buttwoman try again.

After moving into her new home, Mina suffers from an unfortunate car accident that takes her life and transforms her into a very confused ghost. She’s also horrified to find that her new home is being purchased by someone else. Mina makes a few modest attempts at scaring away her unwanted housemates, but to no avail. However, after finding a strange refrigerator in the attic, Mina discovers another approach. Within the fridge is a sentient juice box named Buttlejuice, a wild woman with green hair and a plan to rid the house of its living inhabitants by means of carnal lesbian lust.

Jill doesn’t want to be left out of her friend’s upcoming ski trip, but soon enough, she finds herself caught in a little white lie that won’t stop snowballing. Despite insisting she can handle herself on the slopes, Jill has no idea how to ski. Hoping to correct this, Jill hatches a plan to sneak off for crash course lessons from the best instructor on the mountain, a beautiful sentient twice baked potato named Brimm. Unfortunately, the only thing crashing is Jill.

Lara is a small town girl with dreams of the big city, and when she finally saves up enough for a five day vacation in New York, she decides to plan out everything down to the minute. Unfortunately, from the second Lara lands, she finds herself immediately falling behind. Forced to change her tight schedule over and over again, Lara finally breaks down and declares that she hates New York City.

A heatwave in Southern California is bad news, and when Amanda’s air conditioning unit breaks down, things quickly go from bad to worse. It’ll take a full day to repair, sending Amanda on a desperate mission to keep cool.

There is no denying that food and sex go hand in hand, and never has this been more apparent than with Chuck Tingle’s sizzling erotic collection Sentient Lesbian Food Gets Me Off. Collected within are the most mouthwatering tales of erotic food and drink that you will ever indulge in.

Bobbi’s searching for inspiration at the local chocolate milk shop, heading out to cook up a few new short story ideas with a friend. Unfortunately, this typically productive location has become quite distracting thanks to the seasonal arrival of pumpkin spice lattes, which Bobbi despises. Hoping to seem cool and counteract the extreme basicness of this situation, Bobbi orders a cup of rock milk, but when she spots author Chuck Tingle at one of the café tables, Bobbi starts to wonder if rock milk was the way to go.

Sarah and her wife Alice love Halloween and all things spooky, but their friends are not quite as excited about this upcoming season. After a series of canceled plans, the lesbian couple are feeling frustrated, but when they meet their new neighbors, they immediately find the perfect double date in the form of these beautiful sentient candy corns.

When Lindsey is offered company tickets to a big game of her favorite baseball team, The Lobsters, she can’t believe her luck. Even more amazing, however, is the man she finds herself sitting next to. Now, the physical manifestation of Ketchup is chatting it up with Lindsey, and erotic tensions are high, but when Ketchup offers some of his own tomato goodness for Lindsey’s empty hot dog, she finds herself craving more. That’s when the beautiful manifestation of Mustard arrives, and soon enough, Lindsey finds herself enjoying both condiments.

Allison has been highly trained in the realm of manners and etiquette and is desperate for a job in hospitality. Unfortunately, England is all out of jobs, prompting her to embark on a journey to the new world and a position at Billings Manor. Once arriving in Billings, however, Allison is treated without a shred of dignity from her new boss, Mrs. Glibber.

Alison’s dentist is not happy with her. It’s not that she hasn’t been brushing, it’s the constant stress that’s completely overwhelmed Alison’s body and mind. She’s grinding her teeth, and it’s getting bad. The dentist’s advice: take a vacation. When Alison tries to break free from her daily grind, however, she’s greeted with some pushback from the sentient physical manifestation of her own stress, a living concept named Sophie.

Marge and her sentient log friend, Cole, have noticed a stranger at the local diner in Twin Cheeks, but they’re still curious what brings this beautiful T-Rex to their small town. Further investigation reveals this mysterious stranger to be Agent Hale Boober, a dinosaur tasked with seeking out the best cherry pie in Washington State every 25 years. Boober is almost finished with her quest, but there’s one slice left to taste. Unfortunately, the final cherry pie lies between worlds, in a mysterious location known only as The Snack Lodge.

Alison is a huge fan of the classic Broadway musical, Sabertooth Cats. When she gets a chance to work at the red carpet premiere and write a review of the film, she jumps at the chance, and after making a deep connection with one of the film’s Sabertooth Cats stars, the night couldn’t get any better. Soon enough, Alison and her beautiful prehistoric lover are locked in a wild lesbian encounter.

Jessica Porpo is a respected restaurant critic who is finally getting burned out on her job. After years of fancy, overwrought menus that ooze with pretention, Jessica is taking a well-deserved vacation to a small town in the mountains with simple foods and a relaxing atmosphere. Things are going great until Jessica discovers that a local dinosaur named Reba has opened a restaurant that’s as experimental and overblown as they come. Her curiosity piqued, Jessica pays Reba a visit with the intention of slamming her food.

Joma’s tropical vacation is off to a rocky start when she learns the nearby beach cove is inaccessible to guests. Apparently, local legends of mermopeds in the ocean caves have caused scientists to close down the area and hunt for answers.

Nicole is thrilled to spend the weekend with her friends at Camp Diamond Lake, a secluded campground that used to be all the rage but has since been mysteriously abandoned. It’s only on the drive up that Nicole learns why, hearing the legend of Jesse Voormees, a masked brachiosaurus who stalks the lake at night.