Showing results by author "Carl Reader" in All Categories

These sketches were written and published on the Internet over twenty years ago after the author traveled to Italy and Greece on a whim of discovery. Instead of being informative in telling where to eat and what to see or where to stay, they detail experiences that are as varied and diverse as the countries in which the experiences originated. One sketch muses on the bull-jumpers of Crete, while another talks of an inherited taste for wild mushrooms. You'll discover the Vatican workout, and travel from Italy to Greece under the stars on a ferry boat. Prepare for the unusual, the eccentric ...

Bloody Potomac 2, My Mother Bites is the second in the Bloody Potomac series, in which just about everybody in Washington is a vampire, werewolf or zombie - including the President. The main character, Tasha O'Burke, who is the President's daughter, returns in My Mother Bites from her role in The President's Vampire Daughter, to take on the werewolf threat in this second book of the series. The werewolves of the Supreme Court have made a ridiculous ruling that allows super packs of wild dogs to roam the streets of Washington and dominate and destroy the hapless humans. Tasha has been so ...

A successful Hollywood producer returns home to New Jersey after a couple of divorces and the subsequent burn-out that attends a high-voltage career. Her overly controlling parents think she's back to piece her life back together under their tutelage, but they discover an angry, impatient woman who can't stand to be with them or their neighbor. She's got other plans than showing off her recent TV film and listening to her parents' direction about how to live her life. Her agenda includes an escape across the Atlantic on a 60-foot sloop with her brother, a hot young actress and the man she ...

A nature photographer, Theo Betz, encounters the parents of a missing young woman at the park one morning as he's going out to take pictures. Distraught but hopeful, the parents are giving out posters of their missing daughter to anyone who will take one, including Theo, who is much affected by their predicament. He promises to help in any way he can and begins a journey though the park on which he is forced to examine his feelings on the young woman's unknown fate and his own approaching death. He hopes to find the young woman to alleviate his fears and the fears of others as he ...

Tasha O'Burke, the daughter of the President of the United States and willing vampire, is happily stalking young congressmen on her birthday with her girlfriend, Cari Anne Pomegranate, when there's a bloody rebellion against her father. Led by Speaker of the House John Burner, the rebellion of Blood Pigs takes over the presidency and leaves Tasha and her girlfriend as hunted outcasts whose lives are in danger at every minute. Tasha can hide among the her friends, the bats, but Cari Anne suffers a fate worse than death as she becomes a zombie. Tasha and Cari can be just as violent and gory ...

Joshua Skettleton, a narcoleptic Confederate soldier, is bat-shit crazy. The hope that he'll see his son Josh again and the friendship of another soldier, Jeb Charles, help him to cling to some semblance of humanity while the rank butchery, race, religious hatred and greed of the rich tear his soul apart and nearly destroy his body. Two separate stories intertwine in the book, that of his arrival home and his fight to remain alive in some of the most horrific battles of the Civil War - with the help of Jeb Charles. In alternating chapters, we see Skettleton's progress as he travels the ...

Auntie Claus, Santa Claus' aunt, is an evil, magical elf who has always failed to ruin Christmas in the past, but now has the help of Malicious, who as the opposite of an elf is a self, and the Madison Avenue public relations firm of Steelman, Kreepo and Konmen. Together, they plan on destroying Christmas altogether and replacing it with Auntiemas. With the help of Wall Street's big money, Steelman, Kreepo and Konmen dive headlong into a campaign to discredit Santa Claus and establish the great new holiday of Auntiemas. They attack a gullible public with TV appearances by Auntie Claus, ...

Tasha O'Burke, the President's vampire daughter, gives birth to a baby boy who shows great promise to grow into a powerful member of the clan. From the moment he's born, he shows a lusty desire for blood, but the Washington Ghouls see him as a bargaining chip to get what they want - more and more war dead to feed their perverted appetites for corpses. They kidnap Little Anthony and threaten Tasha she'll never see him again unless her father prolongs the death and destruction of endless war to feed their hunger. The vampire baby has a surprise for the Ghouls, but eventually Tasha and her ...

After a devastating divorce, a man in late middle age travels to Amsterdam to experience all the lusts and pleasures he can in that city's famous red-light district. Charles Ranier wants to discover if a broken heart can be overcome by pure animal passion and throws himself into his quest with anger, humor, lust, doubt and a desire for revenge against the past. At night, he experiences one prostitute after another, always cataloging his feelings and watching his broken heart mend as his passions return. During the day, he drinks in the gorgeous city and its sights, all the while preserving ...

Dirty Presidents and Me is a comical sexual romp through the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s starring Lauralee Bramble, the official White House courtesan and nymphomaniac. After learning her trade at Woodstock, Lauralee applies her talents to servicing one president after another, from Nixon to Ford to Carter to Reagan to Bush and Clinton. It's a satirical sexual autobiography to make the Lewinsky scandal blush.

Star Daze: Working at the Bucks County Playhouse in the 1970s is a series of memory sketches drawn from the experiences of a parking lot attendant and wannabe writer with famous actors and actresses at the Bucks County Playhouse in New Hope, Pennsylvania. It takes place in the wild times of the early 1970s, when love was free and anything could and did happen. With the star system in place at the playhouse, a succession of luminaries from Hollywood, Broadway and television trekked to New Hope to perform and fall into experiences with the bumbling wannabe writer and parking lot attendant, ...

New Hope Daze, Including Star Daze, Bar Daze and Final Daze is a memoir in the form of memory sketches from the author's time working the the artist's town of New Hope, Pennsylvania in the 1970s and 1980s. The first section, Star Daze, recalls brushing shoulders at the Bucks County Playhouse with such luminaries of stage, screen and television as John Carradine, Tom Poston, Tony Danza, Yvonne De Carlo, Brian Dennehy, Dana Andrews and others. The second section, Bar Daze, conjures up the author's time working as a bartender and writer in New Hope, where he befriends artists like Tony ...

SHORT SHORT STORIES FROM A LONG LONG LIFE consists of stories gleaned from many years of living. Some are whimsical, some are terrible and some are totally imagined from a philosophical view of that long life. There is a story of a tragic high school love affair of fifty years ago set off from a chance meeting of sports photographers at a track meet. A confused innocent little boy shoots a little girl in elementary school. An idolizing woman spends the night with the ghost of Lincoln in the White House. A bully dies in Vietnam, despite his friend's efforts to save him from the war. Aliens ...

In Elias, The Twelfth Elf of Kindness, a tiny elf smaller than a dime befriends a little boy, Penman Duckworth, by climbing in his ear to hide from the world. Despite Penman's pleas for the tiny visitor to leave, Elias stays and slowly reveals his magical identity. A friendship grows between the two, and through a hair-raising adventure courage is restored to the wise but frightened elf and happiness returns to the boy's life. Elias, The Twelfth Elf of Kindness is a Christmas tale for the whole family.

A spring morning in Montana is shattered when Joseph Smith emerges from his tepee and his young wife is shot dead at his feet. He races after his wife's murderer but kills Three Pigs before he finds why the man murdered his bride. He returns to Bannack, where his three other wives fall victim to the plot against Smith and where Smith and his sidekick extract a bloody, Old West-style revenge.