Showing results by narrator "Joe Hempel" in All Categories

Being undead isn't anything new for Westlake—former thief and deteriorating Zombivor—until he realizes there's not enough formaldehyde in the world to keep him together. He decides to embark on one last mission into the zombie apocalypse to find a long-lost drug cartel cache which will set his friends up for life. The hitch? It's in Florida. By the time they land in the Everglades, not only is the wildlife a lot wilder and more murderous than usual, but a hurricane looms on the horizon, ready to wipe them from the face of the earth. For Westlake, there is no other choice but to DO OR DIE.

The Era of Nighttime Has Begun... Forty years have passed since the end of the vampire/human war. Vampires have taken over the planet and have settled in, making themselves comfortable in the infrastructure their predecessors built, with just a few adjustments to ensure a permanent night. Humans still exist, tightly controlled, because the alpha species needs to eat. But even after four decades of peace, Reginald can't shake his conviction that the war never really ended — that the archive he still holds in his blood warns of an ominous change on the horizon.

As the star forward for the Boston Blades, I've earned a reputation for no-strings attached hookups and a mean slapshot that has all the ladies purring - but it's never been the one woman I want to see all fired up and ready to score. Boston's own Ice Queen Gwen James has had my emotions all tangled up for years. I've played the games. I've sat on the sidelines. I'm done being benched. When she approaches me for a second chance, I accept on one condition: she's got to prove she's all in. It just might kill me to keep my hands to myself, but it's time Gwen knows what it's like to beg.

Celebrating the persistence of Turtle Power Raise Some Shell critically and cleverly examines the origins, evolution, and impact of the Ninja Turtles phenomenon―from its beginning as a self-published black-and-white comic book in 1984, through its transformation into a worldwide transmedia phenomenon by the middle of the 1990s, and up to the sale of the property to Nickelodeon in 2009 and relaunch of the Turtles with new comics, cartoons, and a big-budget Hollywood film.

When Alexei Medvedev joined the Forgotten Brotherhood - paranormals hired to assassinate other paranormals - he knew it wouldn’t be a cake walk. But his next target is one of Death’s own reapers gone rogue. For the first time since he started this gig, “damn hard to kill” feels more like “damn near impossible”. Tracking Cassie Dobbs brings him to a remote bar in small-town Alaska, where this hot-as-hell reaper is casually serving drinks, as if she doesn’t have a bounty on her head from Death himself.

From some of the biggest names in horror comes an Advent calendar of short holiday horror stories perfect for the darkest nights of the year.

Bill works full-time, plays by the rules, and still drowns in debt. When the final notice comes, it’s not a court summons—it’s a knock at the door after dinner. The collection agency doesn’t want money. They want blood. Flesh. Pain. And they want it now. Lucas, the man sent to collect, never wanted this job. But in a world where the cost of living is your soul, he’ll do anything to keep his wife and daughters fed—and safe from the same fate. As Bill is dragged into a nightmarish system where debt is paid in gore and suffering, Lucas must confront the horrors he's become complicit in.

Welcome to a very special issue of Weird Tales. This issue celebrates the Bram Stoker Awards, the “Oscars” of the horror trade. They are presented every year by the Horror Writers Association (horror.org), a group founded in 1985 (and incorporated in 1987) by a collective of masters of that genre, including Joe R. Lansdale, Karen Lansdale, Robert McCammon, and Dean Koontz. This issue is packed with short stories, flash fiction, poems, and an essay—all written by past winners of the Bram Stoker Award.

Nothing has gone right for Conryu Koda since learning he's a wizard. On his first day at The North American Alliance's Arcane Academy he's greeted by protestors and pelted with tomatoes. On the second day he nearly dies in a magical ritual. It's all downhill from there. With enemies around every corner, not to mention a crazy professor, will Conryu even make it to winter break?

As captain for the Boston Blades, I've spent years working toward bringing home the Stanley Cup. But when the owners sell us out to Hollywood, suddenly we're not just playing for thousands of fans, we're cracking open our lives on Getting Pucked, a new reality show. I agree to sign the contract on one condition: They hire New England's reigning queen of media to call the shots. Holly Belliveaux Carter. The woman who drives me to insanity and turns me on with nothing but a quirk of her lips and the sound of her laugh. The only woman I've ever loved. The problem? She's my ex-wife.

More people than ever are realizing their phones, laptops, and other devices are negatively impacting their quality of life. Take a vacation from technology. In Digital Detox, Amazon best-selling author Damon Zahariades provides an effective, step-by-step plan. Every aspect, from the factors that led to your technology addiction to the life-changing benefits you'll enjoy after taking a technology vacation, is detailed in this fast-moving action guide.

Yaz knows where his people are being held. But rescuing hundreds of villagers scattered across the kingdom is no easy task, especially with Carttoom's army hunting you. When some of the more militant slaves start burning farms and killing people, all Hell breaks loose. Meanwhile, The Dark Sages are determined to capture Ariel and enslave her power for their own evil ends. The battle is joined. The Slave War has begun.

A New Dark Leader Has Emerged... Following Maurice's near-assassination and the overthrow of the American Vampire Council, Reginald, Maurice, and Nikki have fled to Luxembourg, where they've taken refuge under the protection of Karl Stromm and the EU Council. Things in America have continued towards chaos with no end in sight — until a coup shakes the world and a new American leader arrives with promises to restore order and derail the imminent human-vampire war. But things are not as they seem. A dangerous, genocidal faction has arisen to upset the fragile balance.

Miss Teacher hates children, but loves them all the same. Especially boys. Especially Charlie. Until Puppet is ready to play.

If you're sick and tired of feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, and desperately want to make a change, grab your copy of The Time Management Solution today. Reclaim control of your time. Optimize your daily schedule, get more done with less stress, and finally enjoy the healthy work-life balance you deserve!

After receiving a large insurance settlement, young couple Gwen and George fulfill a dream by buying their own little island, a secluded, private paradise surrounded by a lush green landscape of plants. What the real estate man didn't tell them was that a tragedy took place years earlier in the cool, clear pool near the house. And the waters still hold a terrifying centuries-old secret. Soon George begins to notice strange changes in his wife.

Early in their three decades of correspondence, Neil Peart sent Kevin J. Anderson extensive descriptions and travelogues of his adventures bicycling solo across Africa. Peart painted a vivid and unsettling landscape as memorable as the lyrics to his songs. Anderson, award-winning and best-selling fantasy and science fiction author, used those descriptions as the backdrop for plotting an intense, atmospheric dark fantasy story that followed Peart’s experiences, though with a much more ominous twist.

A seasoned invader with multiple home invasions under their belt recounts their dark victories while offering tutelage to a new generation of ambitious home invaders eager to make their mark on the annals of criminal history. From initial canvasing to home entry, the listener is complicit in every strangling and shattered window. The fear is inescapable. Examining the sanctuary of the home and one of the horror genre's most frightening tropes, Anybody Home? points the camera lens onto the quiet suburbs and its unsuspecting abodes.

Interested in experiencing the outdoors but overwhelmed by everything you need to know to backpack safely? Do you have a sudden itch to venture out into the wilderness, wake up next to a babbling brook somewhere and watch the sun slowly come over the horizon? Are you ready to escape (albeit temporarily) from the daily grind and a society that prioritizes consumerism over all else? Backpacking allows us to experience nature in a way that simply isn't achievable through other means.

When Comet Press put out the call for submissions for Stiff Things, we said we were ready to ratchet up the eroticism and visceral intensity with hardcore stories that penetrate new depths of psychosexual horror. But we weren't as ready as we thought we were for the extreme stuff that came flooding in on waves of blood and other bodily fluids we won't mention here. Not that we're complaining. In other words, we got what we wished for...and more.