Showing results by author "The Harvard Lampoon" in All Categories

Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.

Get ready to be transported to the world of Harry Potter in a captivating production that features hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos. You’ll hear footsteps echoing through the corridors of Hogwarts and the heart-racing whoosh of the Golden Snitch as it darts past your ears in the heat of a Quidditch match. Also featuring an electrifying new musical score, The Full-Cast Audio Editions present J.K. Rowling’s iconic series as a truly spellbinding listening event for the whole family.

Get ready to be transported to the world of Harry Potter in a captivating production that features hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos. You’ll hear footsteps echoing through the corridors of Hogwarts and the heart-racing whoosh of the Golden Snitch as it darts past your ears in the heat of a Quidditch match. Also featuring an electrifying new musical score, The Full-Cast Audio Editions present J.K. Rowling’s iconic series as a truly spellbinding listening event for the whole family.

Get ready to be transported to the world of Harry Potter in a captivating production that features hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos. You’ll hear footsteps echoing through the corridors of Hogwarts and the heart-racing whoosh of the Golden Snitch as it darts past your ears in the heat of a Quidditch match. Also featuring an electrifying new musical score, The Full-Cast Audio Editions present J.K. Rowling’s iconic series as a truly spellbinding listening event for the whole family.

THE #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING PHENONEMON A Katie Couric Book Club Pick A Jen Hatmaker Book Club Pick “[A] word-of-mouth smash hit.” —The New York Times “A treasure.” —Hoda Kotb One spring morning, a stranger named Theo arrives in the small Southern city of Golden. He doesn't...

A man. His ex-girlfriend's cat. A sadistic game show unlike anything in the universe: a dungeon crawl where survival depends on killing your prey in the most entertaining way possible. In a flash, every human-erected construction on Earth - from Buckingham Palace to the tiniest of sheds - collapses in a heap, sinking into the ground. The buildings and all the people inside have all been atomized and transformed into the dungeon: an 18-level labyrinth filled with traps, monsters, and loot.

Get ready to be transported to the world of Harry Potter in a captivating production that features hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos. You’ll hear footsteps echoing through the corridors of Hogwarts and the heart-racing whoosh of the Golden Snitch as it darts past your ears in the heat of a Quidditch match. Also featuring an electrifying new musical score, The Full-Cast Audio Editions present J.K. Rowling’s iconic series as a truly spellbinding listening event for the whole family.

The New York Times bestselling Queen of Twists is back with a psychological masterpiece that will leave you questioning everything you know about love, identity, and revenge. This program features multicast narration and is read by actor and Audie Award–winner Richard Armitage, actor Bel...

#1 New York Times Bestseller! Read by Academy Award–winning actress Viola Davis. “Davis is a force of nature, and her performance is riveting.” — Kirkus Reviews Viola Davis and the world's #1 bestselling author James Patterson’s Judge Stone "delivers first-class courtroom drama...

Debbie Mullen is losing it. For years, she has compiled all of her best advice into her column, Dear Debbie, where the wives of New England come for sympathy and neighborly advice. Through her work, Debbie has heard from countless women who are ignored, belittled, or even abused by their husbands. And Debbie does her best to guide them in the right direction. Or at least, she did.

In her latest groundbreaking book, The Let Them Theory, Mel Robbins—New York Times bestselling author and one of the world's most respected experts on motivation, confidence, and mindset—teaches you how to stop wasting energy on what you can't control and start focusing on what truly matters: YOU. Your happiness. Your goals. Your life.

The top 10 list is populated. The sponsorship program is open. The difficulty is ramping up. The first three floors were nothing compared to what Carl and Donut now face. The Iron Tangle. An impossibly complicated subway system built out of the world's subterranean railway systems, all combined and then tied together into a knot. Up is down.

A floating fortress occupied by warrior gnomes. A castle made of sand. A derelict submarine guarded by malfunctioning machines. A haunted crypt surrounded by lethal traps. It was supposed to be easy. One bubble. Four castles. Fifteen days. Capture each one, and the stairwell is unlocked.

A lush jungle teeming with danger. Savage dinosaurs seeking blood. A fallen princess intent on vengeance. A mysterious, end-of-floor celebration for the top crawlers, dubbed “The Butcher’s Masquerade”. The sixth floor. The Hunting Grounds. As the remaining crawlers battle for their lives, a new, terrible threat looms. Outside, tourists are finally allowed to enter the game, and they are here and ready to hunt. Among them is Vrah, a famed and veteran hunter, intent on collecting the biggest trophy of her career.

A cycle of victory and horror: the pride of the Kingdom of Thameland. That is the Ravener’s cycle. Over years of study, Alex Roth is finally an archwizard, has overcome the Mark of the Fool, and empowered his friends and companions. Yet their foe is the mightiest they have faced yet: the Ravener itself, now freed from thousands of years of chains and returned to its full strength.

"Funny, furious, and profane." —The New York Times “Not your typical celebrity memoir.” —Jimmy Kimmel Unflinchingly honest and darkly funny, You with the Sad Eyes unveils a side of Christina Applegate we’ve never seen, forever cementing her formidable and iconoclastic legacy. Christina...

The ninth floor. Nine armies, each led by rich and powerful aliens from across the galaxy. Each team has one objective: to capture and hold the castle at the very center of the battlefield. Strategy, alliances, pitched battles, and, of course, betrayal ... It all makes for great fun and even greater television. After all, none of these powerful aliens really die when they’re playing war. Except this time. This time, winner takes all. Those who fall, stay in the ground.

**Narrated by the author!** Unfiltered. Unapologetic. And straight from the source. Get intimate with Bunnie Xo as she narrates her own incredible story. From the trailer parks of Vegas to the mansions of Nashville, Bunnie Xo has lived a lot of lives and seen the darkest sides of humanity. Her...

Darrow is a Red, a member of the lowest caste in the color-coded society of the future. Like his fellow Reds, he works all day, believing that he and his people are making the surface of Mars livable for future generations. Yet he spends his life willingly, knowing that his blood and sweat will one day result in a better world for his children. But Darrow and his kind have been betrayed. Soon he discovers that humanity reached the surface generations ago. Vast cities and sprawling parks spread across the planet.

From the New York Times bestselling author of Writers & Lovers comes a magnificent and intimate new novel of desire, friendship, and the lasting impact of first love. You knew I’d write a book about you someday. Our narrator understands good love stories—their secrets and subtext, their...

I only try on one of Nina’s pristine white dresses once. Just to see what it’s like. But she soon finds out… and by the time I realize my attic bedroom door only locks from the outside, it’s far too late. But I reassure myself: the Winchesters don’t know who I really am. They don’t know what I’m capable of…